Tag Archives: beer

March 21, 2013 · 9:47 am

Stone Enjoy By 04.01.13 IPA

This might come as a surprise to you, but I like beer. I like IPAs and I like limited/seasonal beers. And so I could not pass up getting a beer called Enjoy By 04.01.13 IPA. They will take it off the shelves on April 2, 2013. It’s a great marketing ploy. It’s a beer with a time limit so you have to grab it while you can. It’s a refreshing India Pale Ale, it’s hoppy with citric notes, slightly malty and it’s fun to drink. The 9.4% alcohol content will leave your head buzzing pleasantly too. The label says it best: “There is no time better than right now to enjoy this beer,” and that’s the truth. Carpe Beerum, seize the brew.

Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Tagged as alcohol content, beer, enjoy by 04.01.13, enjoy by 4/1/13, hops, stone

March 13, 2013 · 10:10 am

Getting Every Last Drop From the Bottle

Things cost money and it’s important to get your money’s worth. It doesn’t matter if it’s a bottle of beer, ketchup, shampoo, syrup or whatever… if you paid for it, you should use it all up. Turn the bottle upside down, smack the bottom, do whatever it takes to get every last drop. Some companies want you to do this. These days Heinz even has upside down ketchup bottles with built-in gravity for maximum condiment efficiency. Getting every last drop from the bottle might make you seem frugal, but it’s better to be cheap than wasteful.

Critically Rated at 12/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Tagged as beer, bottle, drop, getting every last drop from the bottle, gravity, heinz, ketchup, ketchup bottles, shampoo, smack the bottom, syrup, upside down

March 4, 2013 · 10:44 am

Rampage Imperial IPA

Rampage Imperial IPA is an India Pale Ale brewed by Black Diamond Brewing Co. from Concorde, California. This is a full flavored beer, hoppy, malty, and bitter with citrus undertones. It also has a 9% alcohol content. If that’s not enough of a selling point for you, maybe the label art will persuade you. It has a rampaging elephant with demon eyes bursting out from a bunch of hops. It stares you right in the face, daring you to try this beer. And you don’t turn down an angry elephant. You will try this beer. The demon elephant demands it.

Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Tagged as alcohol content, beer, black diamond brewing, hops, india pale ale, malty, rampage imperial ipa

March 3, 2013 · 9:40 am

Birthday Beer

It’s your friend’s birthday and you want to get him something but you don’t want to go overboard. I recommend buying him a birthday beer. You can pick up a 6-pack of something nice, a 12-pack of something decent, or buy a round at the bar. All options are acceptable. Birthday beer is a perfectly valid present for anyone that is 21 or older. 18 if you’re European. Everyone wants to get drunk and nobody wants to pay for it. I’m sure you friend will appreciate the gesture. Don’t buy beer for anyone that you want to sleep with. That’s what wine and hard alcohol are for.

Critically Rated at 13/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Tagged as alcohol, beer, birthday, birthday beer, booze

February 18, 2013 · 10:24 am

Lagunitas Cappuccino Stout

Cappuccino Stout is another limited release from California’s Lagunitas Brewing Co. A good stout usually has hints of coffee and they brew this ale with real coffee. So it tastes like real coffee. And it also has an alcoholic content of 9.2%. That’s stronger than anything that you’ll find at Starbucks. This isn’t the type of beer that you play beer pong with. A stout is something that you sip and enjoy. And Lagunitas Cappuccino Stout is enjoyable and classy and makes you look sophisticated.

Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Youn

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Tagged as alcohol content, alcoholic content, beer, cappuccino stout, coffee, lagunitas, lagunitas brewing co, stout

December 14, 2012 · 9:57 am

Anchor Steam

Anchor Steam beer is the real San Francisco treat. The Anchor Steam Brewing Company was one of the first microbreweries to go national. They have a few different beers, but their flagship beer is Anchor Steam. Steam beer is also called California common beer, the brewing process results in a beer that has both ale and lager characteristics. Anchor Steam is refreshing and smooth. It has an 4.9% alcohol content so it’s not that strong. It’s still a great beer and I’m enjoying one now.

Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Tagged as anchor steam, anchor steam beer, beer, california common, microbrew, san francisco, steam beer

November 26, 2012 · 11:50 am

Bottle Openers

You have a bottle of beer that you want to consume. You can either smash the bottle or pop the cap. I suggest the latter. The best way to open the bottle is to use a bottle opener. You just apply it to the cap and pop it off with a little bit of leverage. There are a variety of ways to open a bottle without a bottle opener. You can use a lighter, another beer bottle, a countertop, your teeth (good luck), or a million other ways. Consult the Internet for those options: this article is about bottle openers. They are designed to open bottles. That’s all they are supposed to do and they do it better than anything else. No household or alcoholic is complete without one. I have three.

Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Tagged as beer, beer bottle, bottle, bottle opener, bottle openers, leverage, opener

November 24, 2012 · 10:41 am

Breaking a Bottle of Beer in Your Backpack

I know that this seems like a really random topic, but it just happened to me at the liquor store. I bought a few tall boys and a couple of bottles, paid the cashier, stuffed the beer in my bag, and dropped it and broke the bottle before he even handed me my change. I knew I was fucked as soon as it hit the ground. I could hear my backpack filling up with beer as the other customers just stood around shaking their heads at me. I had to go outside and pour the beer out of my backpack into the sewage drain. Then I came back inside, collected my change, and sheepishly walked out holding my dripping backpack. Then I got to go home and give my backpack a good rinsing in the shower to get rid of the booze smell and pieces of glass. At least my other beers survived because I definitely needed a drink after that. Breaking a bottle of beer in your backpack is not fun. I wouldn’t recommend it.

Critically Rated at 3/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Tagged as backpack, beer, bottle, breaking, broken, pieces of glass, tall boys

November 10, 2012 · 11:14 am

Coasters

If you have a cold glass and a wood table you need a coaster. Coasters protect the wood from the condensation on the glass. Nobody wants to be the jerk who leaves a water stain, so use a coaster whenever possible. Some coasters are made of sandstone, some are ceramic, some are made of cork, and the cheaper ones you find at bars and restaurants are typically cardboard advertisements for beer companies. The cardboard ones make great ninja stars. If you’ve ever been to a Chili’s or Chevys on a slow night, chances are that the servers are throwing them at each other behind the scenes. That’s why it’s taking so long for your refill. Coasters are classy. They are like saucers for your booze.

Critically Rated at 13/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Tagged as bar, beer, beer companies, beverage, booze, coaster, coasters, cold glass, condensation, ninja stars, water stain

November 1, 2012 · 10:40 am

A Stupid Girl Brown Bagging It

I’m constantly amazed by the stupidity of people. Earlier today I saw a stupid girl brown bagging it on the bus. I know that she was stupid because she didn’t know how to brown bag it. She would take her forty out of the bag, take a sip, and put it back in the bag. That kind of defeats the whole purpose of brown bagging it. You don’t want people to know that you have booze. That’s why you put it in the brown bag. If you don’t know how to drink it public, you shouldn’t drink in public.

Critically Rated at 3/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Tagged as a stupid girl brown bagging it, beer, booze, brown bag, brown bagging it, drink in public

October 18, 2012 · 9:40 am

The Only One Drinking

The other day I was at a barbeque. There were football games on the TV, chips and dip, and we had the grill going nicely. The best part was a cooler full of beers. I helped myself to one as I made small talk. One beer turned into two beers, which turned into three, four, and more. A few rounds and a bathroom trip later, I realized that I was the only one with a brew in hand. I could either stop drinking or keep going. I was past the point of tipsy and had to keep going. I owed it to myself to show those fuckers how to party. YOLO and all that stuff. Being the only one drinking is not a bad thing. It’s just not the best thing.

Critically Rated at 8/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Tagged as beer, booze, day drinking, drinking, drunk, few rounds, one beer, the only one drinking, two beers

September 3, 2012 · 9:22 am

Sloshball

Sloshball is like baseball or kickball but with a beer in your hand. You play offense with a beer, you play defense with a beer, and second base should be a keg. On paper the object of the game is simple: you want to score more runs than the other team before you run out of innings. But the real object of the game is to get drunk and have a good time. You have a good time sacrificing your beer to catch a foul ball. You have a great time by pegging a base runner and smashing his beer cup into his face. You have an awesome time laughing and cheering and celebrating great plays. Sloshball is fun sport, best reserved for birthdays and special events. It’s not recommended for kids.

Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Tagged as baseball, beer, chugging beer, drinking, drunk, keg, kickball, sloshball, spilling beer

August 26, 2012 · 9:18 am

Raging Bitch Belgian-Style India Pale Ale

Maryland’s Flying Dog Brewery makes some amazing craft beers and this is one of them. Raging Bitch Belgian-Style India Pale Ale is a very distinctive beer, from its taste to its awesome artwork. It’s also fun to go to a bartender and say, “Raging Bitch, please.” It has a nice alcohol percentage of 8.3%. It tastes good, looks cool, and it will get you drunk. What more do you want from booze?

Critically Rated at 15/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Tagged as alcohol percentage, beer, belgian style, craft beers, flying dog, flying dog brewery, india pale ale, IPA, microbrew, raging bitch, raging Bitch Belgian-Style India Pale Ale

August 14, 2012 · 9:02 am

Catching Up

Sometimes you get out of work late or get to the party after everyone else. And everyone else is already drunk. So you feel like you have to catch up to get on their level. You’ll start with a shot or two and then progress to double fisting. And then a few more drinks and you’ll take a hit of that. Pretty soon you’re feeling good and you knew that catching up was a good idea. Just don’t pass them. Then it’s game over. Drink responsibly, if there is such a thing.

Critically Rated at 13/17

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Tagged as already drunk, beer, catch up, catching up, double fisting, drinking, drinks, drunk, get on their level, shot

August 2, 2012 · 9:51 am

Leaving the Bar and Coming Back

I was almost responsible last night. I left the bar after a few drinks, feeling slightly buzzed. And somehow I got suckered into going back inside. Leaving the bar and coming back is not a victory. It just shows that you can’t make up your mind and you let booze decide for you. If you leave the bar and follow polite social protocol, you say your goodbyes and hug your lady friends and high-five your guy friends… leaving the bar can be a big production. So when you come back, naturally everyone is confused and slightly judgmental. “Didn’t you already leave?” they ask exasperated and out of breath. All you can do is smile and shake your head, before sipping a beer and asking what the fuck they are talking about.

Critically Rated at 10/17

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Tagged as beer, booze, drink, drinks, friends, goodbyes, guy friends, lady friends, leaving the bar, leaving the bar and coming back, social protocol

July 20, 2012 · 9:35 am

Peer Pressure

Back in the day, peer pressure was what got you to start drinking. Then you get a little bit older, and peer pressure is what keeps you drinking. You will be tired and beat from working earlier that day, but you’ll decide to go out a few drinks with a group. You don’t want to be the one who ducks out early or doesn’t keep up with everyone else. Each time you pay for a round and see your wad of cash disappearing, you want to be responsible and run away. But then someone will offer to buy you another round or chastise you for being a baby. So you stay, even though your liver and your brain are telling you to get the fuck out of there. Peer pressure is letting your drunk friend talk you into being as drunk as he is. Everyone is doing it, so you might as well too. Cheers.

Critically Rated at 8/17

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Tagged as alcohol, beer, booze, drunk friend, keep drinking, peer pressure, start drinking

July 19, 2012 · 6:55 am

Spilling Beer on Yourself

I drink beer a lot. I consider myself to be pretty good at it. Sometimes I get all of it into my mouth. Sometimes I dribble on my shirt a little bit. Spilling beer on yourself is going to happen, you can’t avoid it. The more people that are present, the more likely you are to spill on yourself. You just have to wipe your mouth off and hope no one notices the wet spot on your shirt. It’s not embarrassing if everyone does it.

Critically Rated at 7/17

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Tagged as beer, beer on your face, dribble, little bit, spill, spilling beer, spilling beer on yourself