Monthly Archives: January 2020

Life Below Zero

I’ve had Disney+ for a few months now and I’ve gotten pretty good at it. People ask me what’s worth watching. I’ll tell them the forgotten movies and hidden gems that they should check out. There’s a lot of buzz about Marvel, Pixar, Star Wars and stuff out of Disney’s vault, but not enough attention is paid to their National Geographic section, which is home to The World According to Jeff Goldblum and Free Solo. But the best show I’ve discovered so far is Life Below Zero.

Life Below Zero is a television documentary series about people living in remote areas of Alaska. The show follows their struggles and triumphs as they try to survive the extreme conditions of the Arctic Circle. When the closest store is hundreds of miles away, you have to rely on yourself to get food and water, to fix things that break, to maintain your shelter, all while dealing with deadly weather and dangerous animals trying to eat you.

It’s a great background show. You don’t have to pay too much attention to it. There’s no ongoing plot. You put it on, play around with your phone, and only glance up when something interesting is going on. I used to want to move to Alaska. It’s the last frontier. I went to Anchorage for three weeks in 2014 and I learned that I could never live there full time. But I respect everyone who does because it’s a tough place to live. Now I can live there vicariously through Life Below Zero. Watching other people living their life makes me feel more alive for some reason.

There are a lot of cool and interesting people on the show, but Glenn Villeneuve is by far the best. I can’t talk about the show and not mention him by name. He lives alone and doesn’t rely on any machinery. He doesn’t have a snowmobile or electricity. The most advanced technology he has are guns and hand tools. He truly lives off the land and it’s inspiring to see. He’s a badass and it’s too bad that he’s not in every episode.

Critically Rated at 15/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Filed under Entertainment

Panhandling on the Bus

I was on Muni (San Francisco’s public transportation system) the other day and a homeless guy got on and started begging for money. He had a whole spiel about how he was down on his luck and needed enough money to buy a breakfast sandwich and maybe a small coffee. His delivery was monotonous and robotic, you could tell that he used his speech all the time. He had it down pat.

All I could think was that he was begging the wrong crowd of people. We are all schlubs on the bus with him. Why are you asking me for money? My broke ass is taking the bus for a reason. Go ask the guy driving the Tesla to work. He’s the one with extra money.

Critically Rated at 7/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Filed under Random Rants

Jason Moore

Let me preface this story by reminding everyone that I’ve been in the service industry for more than fourteen years. I’ve heard a lot of interesting requests. A few days ago I had a customer ask me for drink I’ve never heard of before. She asked me for a glass that was half Sprite and half lemonade. She apologized for not remembering the name of the drink. I told her I don’t think there is a name for it. She insisted that there was.

We mentioned the usual suspects. Arnold Palmer: half iced tea, half lemonade. Shirley Temple: Sprite with grenadine. Roy Rogers: Coke with grenadine. John Daly: an Arnold Palmer with vodka. It wasn’t any of those. I went ahead and made her the half Sprite half lemonade and dropped it off. Then I pulled out my phone and googled “Half Sprite half lemonade” because curiosity is a bitch.

I scrolled down for a bit until I found a single post with that recipe. It said that a half Sprite half lemonade was known as a Jason Moore and that the name originated in Arizona. The post had zero votes and zero credibility. But I mentioned the name to her and she said it was right.

I asked all my other coworkers if they have ever heard of a Jason Moore. Nobody had any idea what I was talking about. I asked a few coworkers at my other restaurant if they had heard of it. They were also blissfully unaware of Jason Moores.

I did more research and saw that it’s a known drink on and it only has one post describing it. It was posted in September of 2016 and it only has four likes and one dislike. The one dislike was from me, so there really isn’t much online presence for this so-called mocktail. I’m contributing to its online presence with this blog post right now.

I never knew about the Jason Moore drink. I don’t know who it’s named after. Well, it’s obviously named after Jason Moore… but who the fuck is Jason Moore? Anyone in Arizona have any ideas? Is he the mayor of a small town? Maybe a bored bartender with one moderately successful creation? The world demands answers.

By the way, I made my own Jason Moore to see what all the fuss is about. It’s meh. I’d rather have an Arnold Palmer. Who am I kidding? Make it a John Daly.

Critically Rated at 8/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Filed under Drinks

Natural Light Seltzer

It’s 2020 and we live in a world of hard seltzers. Brands like White Claw, Truly, Spiked Seltzer, Smirnoff Spiked Sparkling Seltzer, Henry’s Hard Sparkling Water, and Wild Basin Boozy Sparking Water are flying off the shelves. It’s a crowded marketplace and more brands are throwing their hat in the ring.

Natural Light decided that they wanted to play too. They came up with Natural Light Seltzer. I was reluctant to try it. Natural Light isn’t a brand known for high quality. It’s for college kids and amateurs. But Natural Light Seltzer has a few good things going for it. Number one: it’s cheaper than the other brands. Number two: it’s got a higher alcohol percentage. It’s 6% ABV, most of the other seltzers are 4.5% or 5% ABV. Cheaper and stronger? Yes please. The third good thing about it: they have great names.

There’s Aloha Peaches (described as When Mango & Peach Go Beach Mode) and Catalina Lime Mixer (described as When Cherry & Lime Become Best Friends). I always enjoy a nice Step Brothers reference. I like both the flavors but I prefer the Catalina Lime Mixer. Aloha Peaches is a little too sweet for me.

I will always prefer beer over hard seltzers, but I find myself drinking more seltzers and fewer beers these days. My local 7-Eleven has a deal on two 25 ounce cans for $5.10. That’s fifty ounces of booze for under six bucks. That’s a hell of a deal, especially for San Francisco. Can’t go wrong with that. Unless you’re driving.

Try it. Or don’t. I don’t care. You do you.

Critically Rated at 13/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Filed under Drinks