Tag Archives: sugar

March 5, 2016 · 3:56 pm

Nougat

I was having a lengthy discussion about candy bars with my roommate (we may or may not have had the munchies) when I discovered that he didn’t know what nougat was. I was kind of shocked. Nougat is an essential ingredient in a lot of great candy bars. Snickers has nougat. Baby Ruth has nougat. Big Hunk has nougat. LOOK! has nougat. Mars bar has nougat. Milky Way has nougat. And somehow nougat is still overlooked and underrated. It deserves more attention and affection. So I decided to blog about it to help get the word out.

Nougat is a chewy confection made with roasted nuts and sugar or honey. There are a few different types of nougat. There is white nougat, brown nougat, and German/Viennese nougat. They are all made differently but I’m not going to tell you the differences between them. Stop being lazy and do your own research on nougat if you’re so fascinated by it. Anyway, a long time ago somebody discovered that nougat tasted good and they decided to combine it with chocolate and the world was changed for the better. Nobody knows who originally combined the two, so I’m just going to give credit to the Pope. You can decide which one.

Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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June 16, 2014 · 10:01 am

Java Monster Mean Bean

Java Monster Mean Bean is an energy drink infused with coffee. Or maybe it’s coffee infused with an energy drink. All I know for sure is that it wakes me up in the morning, it makes me shake, and I think I’m developing a heart murmur. It tastes like iced coffee with cream and an excessive amount of sugar. There is no way that this beverage is beneficial to your health, but I still can’t stop drinking it. I like it. Not as much as Red Bull or a regular cup of coffee, but it’s a nice way to mix things up in the morning. I’m not a big fan of Monster energy drinks, but this one is enjoyable. It’s not as good as a Starbucks Doubleshot Espresso, but it gets the job done.

Critically Rated at 12/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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April 17, 2014 · 11:06 am

Black Coffee

Black coffee is the term for a regular cup of joe. No sugar, no cream, just plain coffee. Cream and sugar makes the coffee more drinkable, but it also makes it so you can’t taste the nuances in the flavor profile. Black coffee is how coffee is supposed to taste. It’s the real deal, the way that coffee’s been consumed for centuries. It’s how your grandma drank it. It’s how the cowboys drank it. And it’s how you should drink it. You won’t impress anyone by drinking a mocha or a cappuccino, but drinking a black coffee will. Order a black coffee when you’re in a breakfast meeting with your boss and you’ll get that promotion you’ve been gunning for. And if he doesn’t give it to you, you can throw the coffee in his face.
Critically Rated at 15/17
Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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November 28, 2013 · 11:15 am

Ocean Spray Cran-Lemonade

Ocean Spray Cran-Lemonade is a cranberry and lemonade juice cocktail. I like it. It tastes good and it’s refreshing. Cranberry juice and lemonade make a good team. Cranberries are tart, lemons are sour, and they go great together. This isn’t a healthy beverage. A 15.2 fluid ounce bottle has 53 grams of sugar. That’s a lot of Pixie Stix. It does have 100% of your daily Vitamin C content so there are some benefits I guess. Ocean Spray Cran-Lemonade is slightly more satisfying than your average lemonade hybrid. There are better tasting, more refreshing, and healthier lemonades on the market, but you shouldn’t be too picky about lemonade. There’s nothing wrong with settling for Ocean Spray.

Critically Rated at 11/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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August 23, 2013 · 10:31 am

Martinelli’s Sparkling Prickly Passion Lemonade

Martinelli’s is mostly known for their line of non-alcoholic sparkling ciders. You mostly see Martinelli’s around the holidays. The adults get wine and champagne; the kids get Martinelli’s. But they make other products too, and Sparkling Prickly Passion Lemonade is one of them. It’s a blend of filtered water, sugar, lemon, passion fruit, raspberry & prickly pear juices from concentrate. It’s all-natural and lightly carbonated. It reminds me of San Pellegrino, but with a less intense flavor. I got it because I was intrigued by the prickly pear. You don’t see that many beverages that include prickly pear juice. It kind of gets lost because of all the other fruit juices, but I think I could taste it and I think that I like it. I would get Martinelli’s Sparkling Prickly Passion Lemonade again, but it’s kind of hard to find and I’m not going to go searching for it. If I see it again, I’ll grab a few and hoard them.

Critically Rated at 13/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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July 24, 2013 · 9:51 am

Mexican Coke (soda, not the drug)

Coca-Cola is a classic American beverage that has been embraced by the whole world and we take a lot of pride in that fact. But Mexico makes better Coke than we do. They use real sugar and package them in glass bottles. Americans use high-fructose corn syrup and primarily package them in cans. You can taste the difference. Mexican coke is slightly sweeter and has less of an aftertaste, but it’s still Coca-Cola, just a better tasting version of it. It’s a little more expensive, but it’s worth it. I fancy myself an amateur soda connoisseur, and Mexican Coke has a place in my personal Top Five Best Sodas list. I’m not sure of it’s exact standing because I’ve never actually made a Top Five Best Sodas list, but it would be on there for sure. Mexican Coke is nostalgia in a bottle, you can experience what real Coke used to taste like.

Critically Rated at 16/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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June 12, 2013 · 9:08 am

Jarritos Mexican Cola

If you’ve ever gone to a real burrito place or taco shop, then you’re probably familiar with Jarritos, the popular soda brand from Mexico. They make a lot of fruit flavored sodas, but they also make cola, specifically Mexican Cola. They use real sugar, and it creates a more authentic cola taste. It’s sweeter than Coke and it’s less acidic. I want to say that it’s better than Coke, but brand loyalty won’t let me admit it. Let’s just say that if I had a choice between a can of Coke or a bottle of Jarritos, I would choose the Jarritos. But if it were a choice between Jarritos or a bottle of Mexican Coke made with real cane sugar, I would choose the Coke. Either way, Mexico wins. But the real winner is real sugar. High-fructose corn syrup is not an adequate substitute.

Critically Rated at 15/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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January 8, 2013 · 11:06 am

Sour Skittles

How do you improve everyone’s favorite rainbow colored bite-sized fruit chews? By adding a shit ton of sugar and calling them Sour Skittles of course. I lied; Sour Skittles aren’t an improvement on the Original Skittles. All that extra sugar makes your teeth hurt more and doesn’t do anything to enhance the flavors. You have the classic Skittles: Grape, Lime, Lemon, Orange, and Strawberry, but each one is made slightly sour with an excessive sugar coating. Sour Skittles are ok every once in a while, but all the other varieties of Skittles are better.

Critically Rated at 11/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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October 31, 2012 · 8:19 am

Diet Coke with Grenadine

I’ve been in the service industry for a few years now and I would always joke about someone ordering a diet soda with grenadine. It was never serious, it was just a hypothetical situation in which a fictional moron would order a sugar-free soda and add cherry flavored sugar to it. It’s the kind of thing that George Carlin would make a punchline out of, like getting a veggie burger with bacon on it. It’s why you don’t pour Red Bull in a decaf coffee.

And then one day a guy ordered a Diet Coke with grenadine. He was serious. My first instinct was to talk him out of it. But he insisted. If I have to contribute to somebody’s diabetes for a 20% tip then so be it. He even had refills. That was the day I lost all faith in humanity and he didn’t see anything wrong with it.  No wonder people hate Americans.

Critically Rated at 1/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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June 3, 2012 · 8:28 am

SweeTarts

SweeTarts are sweet and sour candies made by the Willy Wonka Candy Company. I wish that Oompa-Loompas actually made this candy, but Wonka is owned by Nestle. They are kind of chalky and pasty; you either love them or hate them. A quick look on Wikipedia tells me that they are essentially the same recipe as Pixy Stix or Lik-M-Aid, just in pill form as opposed to powdered. Get kids hooked on sugar and they will keep coming back. I can’t really tell what the flavors are, but they come in different colors and that’s good enough for me.

Critically Rated at 13/17

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