Category Archives: Entertainment

TV, Movies, etc

Planet Terror

            Planet Terror is a 2007 Robert Rodriguez movie and one half of the double feature experience known as Grindhouse. Now when I say that it’s a Robert Rodriguez movie, I really mean that it’s a Robert Rodriguez movie. He wrote it, he directed it, he co-edited it, he produced it, he did the cinematography, and he even scored it. That’s about as hands on as you can get in Hollywood. It’s a glorified B movie about zombies and a stripper with a machine gun leg.

Rose McGowan stars as a stripper named Cherry Darling and Freddy Rodriguez plays her ex-boyfriend, the mysterious El Wray. They bump into each other on a quiet night in a rural Texas town. Things don’t stay quiet for long. A deadly biochemical gas is released at a nearby military base and it’s turning the townspeople into zombies. It’s your classic zombie movie, complete with a ragtag group of survivors doing battle with the undead.

There’s a great supporting cast including Josh Brolin, Bruce Willis, Fergie, Marley Shelton, Naveen Andrews, Michael Biehn, Jeff Fahey, and Quentin Tarantino. The look of the film is pretty unique. They scratched the film to make it look aged and more like a ‘70s flick. At one point there’s a “missing reel” and the film jumps from a steamy sex scene to all hell breaking loose. Suddenly there are more survivors, more zombies, and shit’s on fire. They jumped from the second act straight into the climax and it still works.

I remember watching Grindhouse in the theater. It was one of the best experiences I’ve ever had at the cinema. It had two movies from two of my favorite directors for the price of one ticket, and there were also bonus trailers for fake movies (some of which were so awesome that they turned them into real movies, like Machete). I felt like I went back in time. Quentin Tarantino’s Death Proof is pretty decent, but Planet Terror is more entertaining and fun.

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Jimmy Corrigan, The Smartest Kid on Earth

Jimmy Corrigan, The Smartest Kid on Earth is a graphic novel by Chris Ware about a middle aged loser named Jimmy Corrigan. It’s a very different comic from what you’re used to. The story jumps back and forth between Jimmy’s reality and his fantasies, and it flashes back and forth between the present and his childhood. There’s also a parallel story about Jimmy’s grandfather growing up a hundred years earlier.

Jimmy Corrigan is an awkward loner with a rich fantasy life. He has no friends and feels obligated to talk to his mom on the phone everyday. The main storyline is about Jimmy going to meet his estranged father for the first time, and how the two strangers try to bond despite having nothing in common and nothing to talk about. Jimmy also has a habit of slipping into a fantasy, so he’ll be talking to his father in one panel and killing him in the next before resuming the conversation as if nothing happened.

In the parallel storyline, the focus is on Jimmy’s grandfather growing up with his abusive father. Jimmy’s grandfather is also shy with an overactive imagination, and there are many subtle similarities between grandfather and grandson. They look alike, they act similar, and they both share the same name. At first this parallel story seems unnecessary but everything comes together at the end. It’s a very satisfying ending that ties up a lot of loose strings, but Jimmy doesn’t really change or grow or learn anything. It’s realistic like that. He’s a broken person at the beginning and he’s still broken at the end. He’s not happy being a loser, but that’s all he knows how to be. It’s a great book. It’s a little confusing and off-putting at first, but you can’t put it down once you get into it.

Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Rush Hour 2

Rush Hour 2 is the second movie of the Rush Hour trilogy. Brett Ratner returns to direct, and Jackie Chan and Chris Tucker reprise their roles as Inspector Lee and Detective Carter. The movie starts with Lee showing Carter around Hong Kong in a reversal of the first movie. Now Chris Tucker is the fish out of water. How ironic. Before long there is a bombing at the US Embassy and it’s up to Lee and Carter to find out who is behind it and why.

They investigate the bombing and it leads them to a guy named Ricky Tan (John Lone), a former cop suspected of killing Lee’s father and currently a leader of the Triads. He’s wrapped up in an international counterfeit money laundering scheme involving a rich white guy from LA, a casino, and that chick from Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. Can Lee and Carter get to the bottom of things and solve the case before they get reunited for Rush Hour 3? I certainly hope so.

This is a by-the-numbers sequel. They looked at everything that was good and memorable about the first one, and they tried to tweak it and rework it for this one. Now Lee asks Carter if he understands the words coming out of his mouth. Oh look, they are singing along to the Beach Boys and Chris Tucker is doing a Michael Jackson impression again. I know they are trying to be self-referential but you can’t make the same movie twice. Rush Hour 2 is like The Hangover Part II, everything that happens in the first movie happens again in the second movie, only slightly tweaked and less funny. They used the same story to make an inferior movie, but it worked and made more money than the original. Rush Hour 2 is the highest grossing live-action martial arts film of all time, and that’s almost criminal. Why couldn’t Bruce Lee and Richard Pryor make a movie?

Critically Rated at 10/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Major League Soccer

I went to my first Major League Soccer game last week. I also went to my last Major League Soccer game last week. I saw the San Jose Earthquakes take on Real Salt Lake at the Buck Shaw Stadium in Santa Clara. Buck Shaw Stadium is a small college stadium. Any major league team that doesn’t have it’s own stadium feels like a minor league team. And that’s what MLS is. The players might be professional, but they aren’t good enough to play in the Premier League and that makes them minor leaguers in my opinion. It’s ok to like soccer. But if you like soccer than you should watch the Premier League because it has the best players and the best teams. MLS is like watching benchwarmers play each other. They know how the game works, they are decent athletes, but none of them have the skills or talent to be a starter in a real league. Imagine a bunch of mediocre teams with mediocre players playing mediocre soccer and paying for the experience. That’s Major League Soccer.

A Major League Soccer game is a pretty underwhelming experience and it’s pretty obvious from the get-go. For starters the venders were selling RC Cola. Not Coke, not even Pepsi… motherfucking RC Cola. Classy stuff, guys. More than half the people in the stands are only there because they got free tickets or were forced to go. The rest are actual fans of Major League Soccer. And that worries me because it takes a lot of time and energy to follow a sports team. If you live the in Bay Area and prefer the Earthquakes over the Giants, the 49ers, the A’s, the Raiders, the Warriors, or the Sharks than you have failed at life. Somewhere down the road you made a huge mistake and there’s no chance of redemption. Major League Soccer is a joke and proof that Americans will never take the sport seriously. Unless we somehow win the World Cup, then it’s bandwagon time.

Critically Rated at 5/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Rush Hour (film, not traffic)

Rush Hour is a 1998 comedy/martial arts/buddy cop movie directed by Brett Ratner and starring Jackie Chan and Chris Tucker. One is a hot shot detective from Hong Kong, the other is a loudmouth cop from LA. I’ll let you guess which is which. They are forced to work together when a Chinese diplomat’s daughter gets kidnapped. Detective Inspector Lee (Jackie Chan) is asked by the Chinese to solve the case, and Detective Carter (Chris Tucker) is asked by the FBI to distract Lee and keep him from interfering with the investigation. Carter and Lee don’t trust each other, they don’t like each other, but they have to learn to work together in order to solve the case and save little Soo Yung Han.

Jackie Chan is one of the most entertaining martial artists to ever grace the big screen. He can fight like a motherfucker and does all his own stunts like a badass. And he does some truly spectacular stunts. His fighting style is also unique. Bruce Lee, Jet Li, Chuck Norris… they all just punch and kick the bad guys. Jackie Chan punches and kicks them too, but he’s always trying to escape and avoid fighting. He uses the objects around him for defense and uses them to hurt the bad guys. It’s like parkour as a martial art. He’s not afraid to stand and fight, but he’ll run away if he can. It makes the fights more entertaining, more personal, and more realistic in a lot of ways.

Chris Tucker is talks loud and fast. He is obnoxious and annoying… and somehow endearing. His character is brash, arrogant, and totally full of himself. But he does the right thing when he needs to. Chris Tucker is obviously a Michael Jackson fan and he sneaks a lot of M.J. references into the movie.

The movie is entertaining. There are a lot of plot holes but the producers don’t care and neither should you. Brett Ratner will never win an Oscar but he knows how to make an action flick. The movie is pretty decent, way better than the sequels. The credits are one of the highlights (like most Jackie Chan films) where they show all the bloopers. You see Jackie messing up on stunts and see Chris Tucker messing up his lines. The chemistry they have off-screen carries over into the movie. You should have seen this movie already. A long time ago.

Critically Rated at 12/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Grandma’s Boy

Grandma’s Boy is a stoner comedy flick produced by Happy Madison, Adam Sandler’s production company. It stars Allen Covert, the guy who plays Adam Sandler’s friend in a bunch of Adam Sandler movies. Luckily this movie doesn’t have Adam Sandler in it. Allen Covert stars as Alex, a 35-year-old stoner who works as a videogame tester. He’s kind of a slacker but he gets shit done. He gets kicked out his apartment one day and ends up living with his grandma and her two roommates out of necessity, all while dealing with a major videogame deadline at work and trying to start a relationship with the new office hottie (played by Linda Cardellini).

There really is a plot, but there’s not much of one. Throughout the movie Alex is working on his own game in his spare time. Then his creepy/loser boss steals it and claims it as his own. Alex has to prove that it’s his, and his grandma ends up saving the day by beating the thief in the game, thus proving that her grandson created it. There are lots of cameos and a pretty recognizable cast. Doris Roberts plays Grandma Lily and Shirley Jones and Shirley Knight play her elderly roommates. Kevin Nealon, Nick Swardson, Jonah Hill, David Spade, Rob Schneider, Joel Moore, and a few others play supporting roles or pop up randomly.

My biggest beef with the film is with Dante the Dealer, played by Peter Dante. This movie has a lot of characters and some slightly exaggerated stereotypes, but Dante is too over the top. He orders lions and karate monkeys and is loud and obnoxious. There is no marijuana dealer in the world that acts like him. Maybe the producers are confusing meth heads with stoners, but there’s really no excuse for such a bloated and unfunny caricature of a character. A lot of his jokes aren’t funny; it’s just a set up with no punch line. He drags down the movie in every scene that he’s in, like a live action Jar Jar Binks.

This is a pretty decent comedy. It’s probably the best Happy Madison movie that doesn’t star Adam Sandler. Allen Covert usually plays supporting roles but he proves he can also carry a picture. Grandma’s Boy tanked at the box office, but it has potential to be a cult classic. Check it out if you like stoner comedies, it’s one of the better ones.

Critically Rated at 13/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Big Fish

Big Fish is a 2003 fantasy film and quite possibly Tim Burton’s masterpiece.  Billy Crudup stars as William Bloom, a writer who is trying to connect with his dying father. He feels like his relationship with his dad is like two strangers who happen to know each other extremely well. The problem is that William was never able to connect with his father. His father was a traveling salesman with a passion for telling tall tales and embellishing the truth, and he feels like he never knew the real person behind the stories.

The film is framed by an elderly Edward Bloom (played by Albert Finney) who is bedridden and slowly fading away. The story flashes back to a younger Edward (played by Ewan McGregor) doing fantastic things and having amazing adventures. He meets a giant, a werewolf, Siamese twins, a witch, and has a few encounters with a particularly big fish. On the surface this is a modern fairy tale. But it’s really about reconciliation. Edward and William have a broken relationship. Everything Edward ever told William was embellished and elaborated. William thinks that everything his father told him was a lie. They are bonded by blood but don’t have much in common.

This film is more sophisticated than Tim Burton’s other films. It’s more adult and decidedly less gothic. There is a great supporting cast including Jessica Lange, Danny DeVito, Steve Buscemi, and apparently a young Miley Cyrus. Helena Bonham Carter is in it too and Danny Elfman provides the score. Johnny Depp is the only Burton Regular who doesn’t show up.  I guess there wasn’t a part for a pale pedophile. This is the type of movie that you can watch with your parents and feel like you’ve bonded. Real art effects emotion. This film is art.

Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Batman: Hush (comic)

Jeph Loeb’s story has everything that you like about Batman. If you like Batman, you’ll like Hush. A mysterious villain (who calls himself Hush) is playing a game with Batman, a game of sabotage and revenge. Hush manipulates and uses some of Batman’s greatest enemies to try to destroy Batman once and for all. Batman has to figure out who is trying to kill him and why before he ends up dead. And he doesn’t wanna die because he just started hooking up with Catwoman and she’s kind of hot.

So someone is trying to kill Batman, someone who knows his secret identity, his strengths, his weaknesses, how he thinks. Someone who wants him to suffer. Someone from his past. But Batman’s pissed off a lot of people, so there are a lot of suspects. One of the main themes of the book is family. Bruce Wayne is an orphan, but he still has a family. Catwoman points out that he has a lot of strings for a loner. He has attachments to Nightwing, Robin, Oracle, Huntress, Jim Gordon… Bruce Wayne has a lot of attachments too: Alfred, Leslie Thompkins, Thomas Elliot (his best friend since childhood). He is far from alone.

Jeph Loeb knows how to tell a good story. There are a lot of familiar characters, a semi-original plot, and more twists than an M. Night Shyamalan movie. Jim Lee’s sketches are gritty, provocative, and larger than life, and Scott Williams brings them to life with his inkwork. This is a good solid Batman comic, satisfying and rich.

Critically Rated at 15/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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American Gods

            Don’t tell Harry Potter this, but American Gods is my favorite book. This is the book that I suggest when people ask me what book they should read. Neil Gaiman is an English author who writes about America better than anyone else. In American Gods he takes you all over America and captures the magic and mysticism of the US. It’s almost impossible to describe what the story is about without telling you the whole damn story. Imagine a road trip/mystery novel involving fighting gods and a quiet protagonist with a thing for coin tricks and that’s American Gods. It’s quite an experience.

            There’s this big guy named Shadow who gets out of prison and his life is in shambles. He has no job, his wife is dead, and he has nowhere to go. A mysterious stranger (it’s always a mysterious stranger) offers Shadow a job. And Shadow accepts and finds himself in the middle of a war between gods. There are old gods from Norse and Egyptian and Christian beliefs and there are new gods, gods of TV, technology, and drugs. Gods exist because people believe in them, they get their power from sacrifices made in their honor, whether you sacrifice your time, money, perform a ritual, whatever. Shadow and his boss go all around the US, from small towns to big cities and all the sacred places in between. He even has sex with a cat lady at one point, if you like that kind of thing.

            If that sounds interesting at all then should definitely read this book. And if you want to read it, then you might as well go ahead and buy it because you’re going to reread it. This is a really good book and you deserve good things in your life.

            Critically Rated at 17/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story

Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story is a Judd Apatow comedy about a fictional singer named Dewey Cox. John C. Reilly plays Dewey Cox, a gifted but dimwitted musician trying to create his masterpiece, a song that sums up everything he’s learned about life. It’s pretty much a direct parody of Walk the Line, but it also spoofs biopics in general.

Walk Hard begins with little Dewey Cox accidently cutting his brother in half, and his father spends the next few years reminding him that “the wrong kid died.” This childhood trauma propels Dewey’s desire to prove that he’s worth something and win his father’s approval. He’s a natural at the guitar and soon begins his rise to the top. The film follows Dewey’s life as a rockstar: meeting women, having kids, doing drugs, going to rehab, changing his sound to reflect the current decade, all that fun stuff.

The humor is not for everyone. I know people who can’t make it five minutes into the film without turning it off. Personally, I think it’s one of the funniest movies of the last ten years. There are a lot of absurd moments and intentionally horrible casting, but John C. Reilly is able to make Dewey seem like a real person. His lyrics might be stupid, but to him they’re sincere and more importantly they are consistent to his character. He’s a poet who uses terrible metaphors and believes in what he thinks he knows. And John C. Reilly actually sang all his songs.

There’s a great supporting cast and tons of cameos: Jenna Fischer, Kristen Wiig, Tim Meadows, Craig Robinson, Jonah Hill, Paul Rudd, Jack Black, Justin Long, David Schwartzman, Frankie Muniz, Jack White, Eddie Vedder, the Temptations… the list goes on and on. I like this movie a lot. I still quote this movie more than I should. And I also bought the soundtrack. The iTunes exclusive extended edition in fact. I don’t regret it.

Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Spring Training

Spring training is a glorious six-week long period from mid February to Opening Day. It’s when baseball starts to come back to life as players and coaches come back for practice and exhibition games. Some players are competing for a spot on the team, fighting for a chance to make it to the big leagues, and others are trying to prove they still have some gas left in the tank. And a lot of the old time greats walk around offering advice the players and signing autographs for the fans, trying to prove they are still relevant. Teams either train in the Grapefruit League in Florida or go to Arizona for the Cactus League. Most games are played against other MLB teams, but they’ll also play minor league teams, colleges, and every four years they’ll also play World Baseball Classic national teams.

There is a lot of turnover in professional sports and spring training lets to become familiarized with the new faces and talent. And you also start getting psyched for the real season to begin. Spring training is like pregaming: you can’t just start at the bar for a night of marathon drinking, you have to start drinking early and gradually get ready for the real thing.

Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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The Monday After The Walking Dead

The Monday after The Walking Dead is a great time to be a nerd. AMC’s hit series is one of the coolest and most talked about TV shows on the air. Every Sunday night Rick Grimes and his fellow survivors kill zombies and fight one-eyed bad guys. And you better watch it because everybody will talk about it on Monday morning. You had a night to sleep on it and reflect on the best parts, now you get to stand around the water cooler/coffee pot and gush about how much of a badass Daryl is and speculate on what’s going to happen next. If you watch the show but missed an episode, you should just call out on Monday and stay home because everyone will be talking about what happened. Even if you don’t watch the show, you’re still going to hear all about the latest zombie kills. The Walking Dead is a great show to watch, but it’s more fun to talk about.

Critically Rated at 12/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Overnight (documentary)

Overnight is a 2003 documentary about the fast rise and quicker fall of Troy Duffy, the writer and director of The Boondock Saints. It’s almost like a real life episode of Entourage; you get to see how Hollywood works. And there’s a whole lot of backstabbing and ego trips. Tony Montana and Mark Brian Smith take you behind the scenes to show you the dark side of movie making.

Troy Duffy was a virtual unknown, just a bartender from Boston that played in a band and wrote on the side. Somehow Harvey Weinstein and Miramax found out about him and a script called The Boondock Saints. They bought his script, they named him the director (despite never making a movie before or going to film school), and even gave his band a recording contract. Troy Duffy became one of the biggest sensations in Hollywood overnight.

But then the politics and reality of filmmaking start to present themselves. Making a Hollywood movie is not easy. And Troy Duffy is a difficult guy to work with. He is arrogant and argumentative and grows more and more frustrated as preproduction keeps getting delayed. His business and personal relationships start to flounder as he spirals out of control; he goes from being the toast of the town to the butt of jokes. Eventually his film gets made, but both him and the movie are blacklisted from Hollywood. You can achieve success overnight, but you can lose it all before breakfast time. This documentary about the making of The Boondock Saints is more memorable and entertaining than the film that inspired it.

Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Spoilers

You’re looking forward to that new TV episode or blockbuster sequel to your favorite movie, you’re so excited and the anticipation is through the roof… and then you go on Facebook and see half a dozen spoilers and everything is seemingly ruined. Fucking spoilers. The weird thing is that people love spoilers almost as much as they hate them. They want to know that Harrison Ford is in the new Star Wars movie but they don’t want to know what he does. Spoilers are inevitable. As soon as someone sees something they want to talk about it, it doesn’t matter who is listening. The Internet makes it even easier to make people listen to what they don’t want to hear. I didn’t mean to tell you that Bruce Willis was dead the whole time, it just slipped out. Get over it. It doesn’t matter what happens, it only matters how it happened. A good spoiler only gets you more excited if you want to see it. Everyone knew the Titanic was going to sink but they still saw it anyway. It’s the journey, the experience that makes it interesting. That’s what counts, not that Keyser Söze and Kevin Spacey were the same fucking guy.

Critically Rated at 11/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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The Sandman: Endless Nights (comic)

Neil Gaiman’s The Sandman is one of the most important comics of all time. Endless Nights is a follow-up to the acclaimed series. There are seven stories, each one focusing on one of the Endless. They are character studies of Death, Desire, Dream, Despair, Delirium, Destruction, and Destiny. There’s a different artist for each story, so each story feels more unique and reflective of the main character. On the Peninsula (Destruction’s story) might be the highlight of this graphic novel. It has amazing art by Glenn Fabry and an interesting plot about an archeologist uncovering artifacts from the future. All in all, Endless Nights is not essential reading, it has no bearing on the main storyline. It’s a way to learn more about Dream’s fucked up family and get a little more information about The Sandman Universe. So only read it if you’ve read all the other ones, otherwise you’ll be lost.

Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Silly Putty

Silly Putty is like a more extreme version of Play-Doh. You can mold it into different shapes, but you can also bounce it, stretch it, and even copy newspaper ink. You can fold it over itself and create little air pockets that have a satisfying snapping sound when you pop them. You can use it to fingerprint yourself and then stretch it out to enlarge it. They have a flesh-toned color one that you can use to make you chin look bigger, or have an extra finger, or forgot to zip up your fly. It comes in a little egg shaped container and that’s where it lives when you’re not playing with it. It’s one of those rare toys that transcend playtime and become educational, useful, and practical in ways you never thought possible. The best toys are the ones that require your own imagination.

Critically Rated at 16/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Cast Away (film)

Robert Zemeckis directs Tom Hanks in Cast Away, the story of a FedEx worker who gets stranded on an uninhabited island after a plane crash. The last time they collaborated together they made Forrest Gump, truly a landmark film. Cast Away is a solid film, but is nowhere near a masterpiece. Tom Hanks carries the movie but gets upstaged by a volleyball. Tom Hanks has won multiple Oscars and Golden Globes for Best Actor and a volleyball ends up having the best performance in the movie. Wilson didn’t even have any lines.

Chuck Noland (Tom Hanks) is a systems analyst for FedEx. He’s obsessed with time and making things more efficient. He’s got a girlfriend (Helen Hunt) and life is pretty good. Then he ends up stranded on a deserted island in the South Pacific. He spends the next four years fighting for survival with only a volleyball and a picture of Helen Hunt to keep him going. After four years of isolation he manages to build a raft and escape the island.

He returns home and there’s nothing waiting for him. His girlfriend has moved on, gotten married, and had a kid. He lost Wilson at sea. He doesn’t have a Facebook account. He doesn’t have anything except for some stupid mantra that “tomorrow the sun will rise” so he has to keep going. Then he delivers the FedEx package that he kept for four years and never opened. But he delivers it to the chick that sent it, not to the recipient. He works for FedEx; he should know how deliveries work. The movie ends with Chuck standing at a crossroads wondering which road to take and where life will take him next. If you like deserted island movies, Tom Hanks, or vague and unsatisfying endings, Cast Away is the movie for you.

Critically Rated at 11/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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