Tag Archives: party

A Day That Never Ends

Yesterday was an epic day. It was one of those days that stretches on and on and you do so many random things that it doesn’t seem like you did them all in the same day. It was like a real life version of Ferris Bueller’s Day Off. I hung out with some amazing friends, we did a lot of amazing things, and we somehow managed to cram it all into a twenty-four hour period. We started the day by meeting at McDonald’s and grabbing a quick bite to eat before going to Golden Gate Park to participate in the AIDS Walk. We walked for a few miles and helped make the world a better place. Then we decided to get some bottles of champagne and have mimosas on the beach. We deserved it. We went to the grocery store and bought some booze and juice, plus a few other essentials like sandwiches, chips and dip, and some bubbles. You gotta have bubbles. We marched out to the beach and staked out a good log to sit on while we munched our munchies and drank our drinks. We talked and we laughed and we people watched. We saw a group of guys flying kites in formation, doing all kinds of synchronized tricks like they were the Blue Angels of the kite world.

We finished our four bottles of champagne in record time and decided to keep the party going. We went back to the grocery store to reload on booze and chips, but then we decided to find a cool spot in the park rather than go back to the beach. We took a few overlooked paths before finding a cool spot with rocks to lay on and trees to climb. I cracked a brew, shimmied up a tree, and posted up there for a few hours. There was a restaurant nearby that had outdoor seating and it was out of sight but still close enough that we could hear their music blasting. Luckily their music was an actual band that played classic rock songs from the ‘50s and ‘60s. We were essentially listening in on a live concert. We could have stayed there forever, but the music eventually ended, the sun went down, and it started to get cold.

At that point we said fuck it, went to the store and got more booze, and then went to our friend’s house to hang out. We had more drinks, more laughs, and we listened to gangster rap and released our inner thugs. At one point I left to have dinner at a Mexican restaurant, but I came back to the house right after. We partied some more, drank some more, and laughed some more. Did I mention the drinking and the laughing? Because that was the theme of the day. Midnight came and went, and things were going great until someone mentioned that it was 1:30 a.m. and we still had time to go to the bar to make last call. You can’t survive the whole day and suddenly become a party pooper, so I reluctantly went for one last drink. I didn’t even order my own, I just sipped from my friend’s beer.

I wish I could say that I was responsible and went home after the bar closed, but we went back to my friend’s house for a little bit longer. It was somewhere around 2:30 or 3:00 that I finally threw in the towel and went home. I got home and fell into my bed and slept like a rock until I got up, checked Facebook and saw all the pictures and comments from the day before, and decided my day was awesome enough to Critically Rate it. So that’s what I did, and now I’m done. The best days in life are the spontaneous ones, the ones that never end. I knew that yesterday was special early on. I knew that I would remember it forever. I made sure to live in the moment and I’m a little sad that the moment’s already passed. And now I can’t wait for my next epic day.

Critically Rated at 16/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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House Party

Parties are fun, but it’s hard to top a good house party. House parties are awesome because there is no guest list, there is no dress code, there is no last call, and there is no closing time. You don’t have to get your wrist stamped or worry about reentry if you go out for a smoke break. You get to control the music so you don’t have to suffer through a crappy DJ’s shitty set. The only downside is that you have to bring your own booze, but that still saves you money. A hundred bucks will get a lot more alcohol from the liquor store than it will get you at the bar. People have fun at bars and clubs, but they go nuts at house parties. It’s all friends and no strangers, so you feel more comfortable, relaxed, and less afraid of embarrassing yourself, and that means you’ll be drinking harder and longer than you would if there was a bouncer watching you. There are always a couple fun drinking games going on, a few random hookups to laugh about, and hundreds of random conversations about nothing to jump in to. The night goes on and on, and people start passing out and sleeping wherever they find a quiet corner to disappear in. Eventually the sun starts to rise, the party ends, and you get a smile on your face whenever you remember that night.

Critically Rated at 16/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Afterparty

You’re partying and socializing at the bar when you hear those dreaded words: “LAST CALL FOR ALCOHOL!” The bar is closing, but you’re not ready to stop having fun yet. That’s when you need to find out where the afterparty is. Someone is always down to open their doors and invite everyone to come over to keep on drinking. Everyone piles into a few taxicabs and makes the trek to the new hangout spot, stopping only for more booze and supplies at a nearby liquor store. Everyone shuffles inside and they either make a beeline for the living room and grab a seat, or they head straight to the kitchen to start pouring drinks. Someone will pretend to be a DJ and play music, but they will never let a song play the whole way through. The craziest parts of the night almost always take place at the afterparty. That’s when people are the most drunk and that’s when people get rowdy. That’s when people throw up, when people pass out, when people hook up, when people fight, and when people accidently break stuff.  The afterparty is an essential part of the night, as important as pregaming or the main party. It’s the best and most satisfying way to end the night. It only sucks when you have to clean everything up the next day.

Critically Rated at 16/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Keg Stand

No kegger is complete without a keg stand. That’s when you do a handstand on a keg of beer and attempt to drink as much as you can while upside down. Someone puts the keg tap in your mouth for you; other people hold onto your legs for support, and everyone else cheers while they wait for their turn. You can turn it into a contest and count out how long each person stays up for. The winner gets drunk, and everybody else does too. It’s a great game. Keg stands can be a little intimidating and you might be reluctant to try it because you don’t want to make a fool of yourself in front of everybody, but you should give in to peer pressure and go for it. You might be the best keg stander in the world, you’ll never know until you do one. Try it. I believe in you.

Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Filed under Drinks

Make Your Escape

You’re partying and drinking with your friends and you’re having the time of your life until you look at the clock and notice the time. You have to wake up early tomorrow for work, and you know that you have to leave soon. Having fun is awesome but you still have to be responsible, and sometimes that results in a self-enforced bedtime and leaving the party early. But you can’t just leave. You need to have an evacuation plan. You don’t want to draw attention to the fact that you’re leaving, because you don’t want to be a party pooper. There are a few ways to make your escape. You can silently ninja-slip out without saying any goodbyes. You can pretend like you’re going out for a phone call and that you’ll be right back, and then you run away. Or you can wait for the mass exodus, when a cluster of three or more people leaves at the same time. Then you can say your goodbyes and still leave without causing a fuss. You should always be prepared and know how and when to make your escape. When you see your opportunity, you gotta take it.

Critically Rated at 12/17

Written, Rated and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Ordering a Pizza While Drunk

I went to a going-away party the other night and proceeded to get shitfaced with about fifty friends. We were doing shots, drinking cocktails, chugging down beers, and drunk people are known to get hungry. We decided to order a couple of pizzas and that turned into a process. First we had to decide on a place. Then we had to figure out how many people are eating so we would know how many pies to get. Then we had to figure out what toppings you want, and that part took forever because some people are vegetarians and some people are opposed to pineapple and some people can’t eat cheese. It turned into a debate over whether or not to get a meat combo or a veggie combo or a plain cheese pizza, and everyone was drunk so they all have an opinion, and everyone’s opinion was loud. We finally decided on the three pizzas that we would get, and then another argument started over who would call and place the order. Everyone had a lame reason or an excuse over why they couldn’t be the one to call. Eventually I gave in and I called. I didn’t even bother leaving the room full of rowdy drunks, so I had to yell so that the lady could hear me and kept having to ask the lady to repeat herself. After five minutes I finally got the order in, but then we had to collect the money, and that was the biggest hassle of all. Some people had cash, but only big bills that had to be broken. Some people only had cards. Some people had to borrow money from other people. Everyone wanted pizza and that meant some people weren’t going to eat any. Ordering a pizza while drunk is a chore, but eating a pizza while drunk makes it all worthwhile.

Critically Rated at 11/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Filed under Drinks, Snacks

The First Party of Summer

Summer’s here and it started last night with the first party of the season. It was the first day of June, it was a Saturday, it was meant to be. Now it’s summer, now it’s official. I’m not even in school, I haven’t been for a few years now, but something about summer makes me feel free. It doesn’t matter that I still work 5-6 days a week, it’s still fucking summer. Summer is the season of slacking off, of living life, and of having fun. And there’s nothing quite like that first party of the summer. Beer, barbeque, a bonfire, maybe a blunt or two… the laughter flows like wine, the wine flows like water, and the beers are never ending. The first party of the summer is usually one of the most memorable. As the season drags on, the parties become more mundane and more routine. But everything is fresh and new and exciting the first night. The whole goal of the night is to wake up with a hangover. I succeeded.

Critically Rated at 16/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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J1s

If you don’t know what a J1 is, then I feel sorry for you. J1s are glorified tourists who get a J1 visa that allows them to work in America for a few months, with extra time allotted to tour the states and see the sights. It’s basically a work and travel program for college students from various European countries and a few South American countries. If you’ve even been to New York City, San Francisco, Orlando, or any other hotspot during the summertime and heard a delicious accent from an employee at a touristy restaurant like Hard Rock or Boudin, that was probably a J1.

J1s live together in hotels or hostels, often 3 or 4 crammed into a small space. It is basically dorm living, but you are in America and you have a right to go crazy and party every day and night. And that’s what they do. The cool ones at least.

The J1s experience more of America than most Americans do. They make sure to visit New York City and San Francisco and everywhere in between. They visit Vegas and Disneyland and go skydiving. They live more in 4 months than a lazy American does in 4 years.

J1s have a chance to explore the world and they make the most of it. And then they go home and you talk to them on Facebook. If you are fortunate to befriend some of them, it’s comforting to know that you have a couch you can crash on in Croatia if you need. Or Serbia. Or Ireland. Just don’t go to Moscow. Long story.

Critically Rated at 17/17

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