Tag Archives: string cheese

Babybel

I like cheese. Cheese is good. It takes burgers to another level. It turns tortilla chips into nachos. Cheese is like bacon. It makes everything better but it’s best enjoyed by itself. If I’m eating cheese as a snack I generally prefer some type of string cheese, but every once in a while I get the hankering for a Babybel. Babybel is a brand of cheese with a distinctive look. Each mini cheese wheel is encased within a protective red wax cover. 

The cheese is decent but the red wax seal is the star of the show. After you eat the cheese you’re left with the wax. You can mold and squish and squeeze the wax. Its not as malleable as Silly Putty, but it’s still fun to play with. Babybel is an interactive snack. The wax also makes it holds up better than most cheese so you can take it hiking or backpacking. It’s a heavy duty cheese for traveling and enjoying life outdoors. You can also also eat it at the office. It’s very versatile. 

Critically Rated at 13/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young 

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Getting Stoned and Going Grocery Shopping

One of the biggest mistakes I’ve ever made was getting stoned and going grocery shopping before a camping trip. Anyone who has ever blazed knows what it’s like to experience the munchies. You take a few puffs and suddenly all you want is Cheetos and a Coke. And some Skittles. Oooh, and a Snickers too. Now imagine that you have to buy enough food and drinks to last for the next three days. You don’t want to underestimate how much shit to get, so you’ll compensate by buying a lot more than you need. Instead of getting a pack of 8 sticks of string cheese, you’ll get a pack of 32 just to be safe. Instead of one pack of hot dogs, you’ll buy two. And you can’t forget the buns, ketchup, mustard, and relish. And what goes good with hot dogs? Potato chips! So then you get a few bags of chips, and some dip to go with it. And then a few packs of beer to wash it down. And a few cases of soda just in case somebody doesn’t want beer or if you need a caffeine boost. And obviously you need ice to keep all the drinks cold and the food from spoiling. All that shit adds up, and it adds up quickly, and it doesn’t help that your stoned ass is walking up and down each aisle throwing more unnecessary shit into your cart. Before you know it, you’re at the register and you owe them $364.24. Then you go camping for a few days and end up with a fridge full of expired leftovers that remind you of your stupidity. And you don’t even want to eat any of it because it all tastes like failure. This is the type of situation they should discuss during anti-drug assemblies in middle school.

Critically Rated at 5/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Dropping Your Food Before You Take a Bite

Nobody is perfect. And nothing is a greater reminder of that like dropping your food before you even take a bite. That sucks. It’s infuriating. It’s always something delicious or something you’ve been craving for a while too. You get it at the store and you’re all excited for your taste buds. You prepare it, get it all ready, get yourself comfortable and situated… Just as you are about to sample that first savory bite, your clumsy ass drops it on the floor. You stare in sullen disbelief, not even the five second rule can redeem this fuck up. You have failed and you know it. I really wanted that string cheese too.

Critically Rated at 4/17

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Precious Stringsters

Ahhhh, string cheese, a lunchbox staple. I prefer mozzarella string cheese over the other varieties. You can peel fat strings or thin strings. This is a really cheesy, really stringy string cheese and is that what we want from our string cheese? The only bad side is when the cheese is a little past its prime and it is more chunky that peel-able. Gross.

Critically Rated at 14/17

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