Tag Archives: cheese

Babybel

I like cheese. Cheese is good. It takes burgers to another level. It turns tortilla chips into nachos. Cheese is like bacon. It makes everything better but it’s best enjoyed by itself. If I’m eating cheese as a snack I generally prefer some type of string cheese, but every once in a while I get the hankering for a Babybel. Babybel is a brand of cheese with a distinctive look. Each mini cheese wheel is encased within a protective red wax cover. 

The cheese is decent but the red wax seal is the star of the show. After you eat the cheese you’re left with the wax. You can mold and squish and squeeze the wax. Its not as malleable as Silly Putty, but it’s still fun to play with. Babybel is an interactive snack. The wax also makes it holds up better than most cheese so you can take it hiking or backpacking. It’s a heavy duty cheese for traveling and enjoying life outdoors. You can also also eat it at the office. It’s very versatile. 

Critically Rated at 13/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young 

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Cheez-It Hot & Spicy

Cheez-It is a brand of snack crackers made with real cheese, and Cheez-It Hot & Spicy is a hot and spicy version of them. It’s made with Tabasco, but it’s the green Tabasco, not the normal red one. You know, the red one that everybody prefers. They still taste good, but it’s disappointing because you know that they could have tasted better. They are salty, cheesy, and they have a little jalapeno kick. They are spicy, but they aren’t really spicy. I would say they are on the mild side of medium. I could eat a bag of them, but buying a box would be a waste. Whatever, it’s good to see that Tabasco is still around in this Sriracha-dominated society. Don’t get me wrong, Sriracha is the shit but Tabasco is an originator. You might get a little cracker residue on your hands, but they aren’t really greasy. It’s a satisfying snack and it cures the munchies. I’m happy.

Critically Rated at 12/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Cheese and Crackers

            You got invited to a dinner party and you’re not quite sure what to bring. Beer and wine are always acceptable, but everyone brings beer and wine. You can’t go wrong by bringing some fancy cheese and crackers. It’s an appreciated hors d’oeuvre. It’s something to nibble on while you sip your booze and make idle conversation. There are so many great types of cheese out there; you have to try them all to find out which ones you prefer. Generally speaking, the more it stinks, the better it tastes. If you’re bad at choosing cheese, you can always grab a premade platter. They will have a few types of cheese, some crackers, and salami or pepperoni. Some of the fancier ones might include olives or grapes. You can’t go wrong with cheese and crackers. Even if you don’t know how to cook, you can still make a good impression with a decent cheese platter.

            Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

 

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Hot Pockets Pepperoni Pizza

Hot Pockets Pepperoni Pizza is the frozen microwavable pizza pocket that you grew up with. It’s glob of melted cheese, grease, and meat with a terrible tasting dough holding it all together. The end result is a turnover that tastes somewhat similar to a slice of pizza. The filling will be hot enough to burn the roof of your mouth with one bite and will be ice cold with the next. There is no such thing as a perfectly cooked Hot Pocket. It simply can’t be done. Or so I thought. I was looking at my Hot Pocket wrapper and I noticed that there are instructions for cooking the Hot Pocket in the oven, so I tried baking it instead of nuking it. It takes about 28 minutes to cook in the oven (not including preheating) and that’s a ridiculously long time to wait for a fucking Hot Pocket… but the filling was consistently hot throughout, the crust was nice and crunchy, it was as close to perfection as any Hot Pocket could be. But there’s not point using the oven to cook microwavable food. It defeats the purpose of buying microwavable food.

Critically Rated at 10/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Cheez-It Big

Sometimes you’re hungry and want something more than a snack but less than a meal. There was once a time where you were doomed to stay in this hunger limbo, but now there are big Cheez-Its. They are cleverly packaged as Cheez-It Big. It’s “Twice the Size!” with “Big Taste!” They taste like regular Cheez-Its, but they are bigger. I don’t know why they had to make them bigger. It’s not like a bigger Cheez-It is more practical than a regular sized Cheez-It. They both fit in your hand, they both taste the same, and they are just as portable. We are getting sick of remakes and sequels in Hollywood, we don’t need it from snack companies too. There is really no reason for this product to exist.

Critically Rated at 12/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Precious Stringsters

Ahhhh, string cheese, a lunchbox staple. I prefer mozzarella string cheese over the other varieties. You can peel fat strings or thin strings. This is a really cheesy, really stringy string cheese and is that what we want from our string cheese? The only bad side is when the cheese is a little past its prime and it is more chunky that peel-able. Gross.

Critically Rated at 14/17

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Kraft Easy Mac

All the flavor and taste of the regular Kraft Macaroni and Cheese. Easy Mac is is individual sized portions of Kraft Mac and Cheese. The portion size is less than ideal. Super easy to make. All you have to do is dump the noodles into a bowl, add 2/3 cups of water and microwave for 4 mins and add your cheese mix and stir. If you fuck it up making it, I’ll stop being your friend. A drunken lifesaver at 3:30 AM.

Critically Rated at 12/17

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