Tag Archives: caramel

Ben & Jerry’s New Belgium Salted Caramel Brown-ie Ale

I like beer. I like ice cream. Ben & Jerry’s New Belgium Salted Caramel Brown-ie Ale combines the two. They use New Belgium Brown Ale ice cream and combine it with fudge brownies and salted caramel swirls. I was expecting to get a slight whiff of beer when I took off the lid, but it just smelled like normal ice cream. Well, I’ve never really smelled ice cream before but it didn’t seem to have much of an aroma at all. I took a spoonful and put it in my mouth. My first thoughts were that it was smooth and creamy and not much else. I took another bite, and then another, trying to find a distinguishing flavor, but there really isn’t one. It doesn’t taste like a brown ale at all. It’s bland. I can taste the caramel and brownies, but the New Belgium Brown Ale ice cream is more boring than vanilla. I was expecting an ice cream that tasted like beer. I just got ice cream. Meh. It’s a limited batch. It’s going away soon. Good.

Critically Rated at 7/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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S’moreos

It’s slow season at the restaurant where I work at right now, and we had a little downtime after the lunch rush the other day. We started coming up with ideas for new desserts using the stuff we had available. We got a couple of jumbo marshmallows and a pack of Oreos. We would toast a marshmallow with a butane torch, cram it between two Oreos, top it off with a generous drizzle of caramel, and proceed to stuff our faces. Each bite was pure bliss and more of a sugar rush than a shot of grenadine mixed with Kool-Aid. I dubbed them S’moreos, a combination of S’mores and Oreos. I thought I was really clever for coming up with that name, and then I googled it and found out that S’moreos already exist. We invented our own recipe though, that’s got to be worth something.

Critically Rated at 15/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Rolo

Rolo is a candy. It has nothing to do with YOLO. Let’s just get that out of the way. A Rolo is a soft chewy caramel covered with milk chocolate. It’s simple, sweet, and delicious. They are packed in a tube, with each bite-sized piece stacked upon each other. It’s not as satisfying as a Snickers bar. You eat one Rolo and you want another one and then another one. It’s good, but you’re never content. That’s how they get you. You just keep popping them into your mouth until they’re all gone. And you don’t really care when they are gone. You should be mad when you run out of candy. But you’re indifferent when you run out of Rolo. They are decent candies, but nobody would ever notice if Rolo was taken off the market tomorrow.

Critically Rated at 8/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Cracker Jack

Cracker Jack is a delicious blend of caramel coated popcorn and peanuts with a prize. You can’t forget about the prize. There used to be a cool prize like a magic ring or a whistle, but these days it’s usually a temporary tattoo or a paper cutout of some bullshit. Popcorn and peanuts are awesome by themselves, so when they combine their forces and also get caramelized it’s a delight for your taste buds. You don’t eat Cracker Jack every day. In fact, you forget about it for months at a time. But then baseball season comes back and you stars singing “Take Me Out to the Ballgame,” and you get the sudden urge to buy them. That song is product placement at its best.

Critically Rated at 12/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Baby Ruth

Baby Ruth is an American candy bar. It has peanuts, chocolate flavored nougat, caramel and a chocolate coating. It tastes like a generic Snickers bar. The name is a blatant rip-off of Babe Ruth. The makers claim it’s named after President Grover Cleveland’s daughter Ruth. That’s bullshit. I know it. You know it. They know it. Babe Ruth knows it. It’s a decent candy bar; it just pales in comparison with Snickers.

Critically Rated at 11/17

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Twix

Two for me, none for you. Twix are cookies bars with caramel and a chocolate coating. They are delicious. As George Costanza will tell you, Twix is the only candy with the cookie crunch. They come typically come in pairs of two per pack. Wikipedia tells me that they are called Twix because they are “twin sticks”. That makes sense. If you are an American, you love cookies, caramel, and chocolate; a candy that provides all of the above is proof that God loves us and wants us to be diabetic.

Critically Rated at 13/17

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