Monthly Archives: December 2014

When Everybody Is Sick On Public Transportation

I can tell that it’s going to be a long winter when everybody is sick on public transportation. I live in San Francisco and it’s been raining and cold the last couple of days. That means whenever I get on the bus or train I hear a symphony of coughs, sniffles, and sneezes. There’s no such thing as silence, only sounds of sickness. There’s no escape from the germs and bacteria all around you. You know that it’s just a matter of time before you catch something and get sick too. Hopefully it’s just a cold and not Ebola. Or Swine Flu. Or SARS. Are we still scared of SARS? It’s hard to avoid getting sick when everybody else is, especially on public transportation. All you can do is use hand sanitizer every couple of minutes and try not to get sneezed on.

Critically Rated at 4/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Linsanity (documentary)

Linsanity is a 2013 documentary about NBA player Jeremy Lin and his rise to international stardom. Director Evan Jackson Leong and narrator Daniel Dae Kim tell the story one of the most famous athletes in the world, a spectacular feat considering he’s not that great of a player and barely managed to eke his way into the NBA. Everybody loves inspirational sports stories like Rudy, but Lin’s journey was way more impressive. Lin was one of the best high school players in California, but he was hardly recruited by any colleges because he didn’t fit the mold. By not fitting the mold, I mean that nobody wanted him because he’s Asian. He didn’t get any athletic scholarships and ended up going to Harvard because he would have a place on the team. He went undrafted after college, but eventually signed with the Golden State Warriors. He didn’t get much playing time and they waived him at the end of the season. The Houston Rockets picked him up and they waived him too. He managed to get a gig with the New York Knicks but he still wasn’t getting a chance to play.

The Knicks were in a bit of a slump and they decided to mix things up a bit by giving Lin some playing time. He took advantage and had twenty-five points, seven assists, and five rebounds in thirty-six minutes. That was enough to grant him a start the next game and he dominated again. Then he dominated the game after that. And the game after that. All in all, he had a nine game stretch where he averaged twenty-five points and nine assists in thirty-nine minutes per game. He became a superstar virtually overnight. Something special was happening and everyone wanted to be a part of it. It could only be described as Linsanity.

Linsanity takes you back to Jeremy’s childhood, how he inherited his love for the game from his father, the bond he shares with his brothers, and his dislike for playing piano. They stress his values in life are religion, family, and basketball (in that order). The filmmakers also show you Lin’s impact on the Asian community. He became a role model, albeit somewhat reluctantly. Jeremy Lin is not a great basketball player, but he is capable of great things. He inspired the world for fifteen days in February of 2012 and etched himself into our collective memory. Relive Linsanity with Linsanity. I watched it on Netflix. You should too.

Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Snapchat

Snapchat is a social media app. It’s the trendy thing that all the cool kids are doing right now. The premise of Snapchat is simple. You take pictures and videos and share them with friends and followers. The hook is that the videos and pictures can only be viewed briefly before they disappear. It’s great for sexting, but you can also use it as a personal video journal of sorts. You can share a snippet of a concert or sunset with friends. You can show everybody that weird guy at the grocery store instead of merely describing him later on. I got Snapchat a couple of months ago and I use it a couple of times a day on average. Mostly I’m watching whatever my friends send me, but I’ve been known to do a few Snaps when I’m drunk or bored (or both). I mostly take selfies with something weird in the background, like a toilet bowl or a coworker eating lunch. The most important thing about Snapchat is being aware that it will notify the other person if you take a screen shot of something they sent you. Remember that when you’re sending pictures of your cooter out, ladies.

Critically Rated at 12/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Survive and Advance (documentary)

Survive and Advance is a documentary that was released as part of ESPN’s 30 for 30 series. I can’t get enough of the 30 for 30 documentaries. There are so many great stories in sports, and it seems like ESPN is out to cover them all. This documentary is about the 1983 NC State Wolfpack winning nine elimination games in a row on their way to capturing the national championship in a spectacular upset. Derek Whittenberg threw up a shot in the closing seconds out of pure desperation. The ball was a little bit offline, but Lorenzo Charles was there to snatch the ball out of the air and slam it through the net with a second left on the clock. It was a great play to end the game, and it was further immortalized when coach Jim Valvano ran out onto the court in celebration and couldn’t find anybody to hug. Even non-sports fans can appreciate an underdog story, and it doesn’t get much more underdog than this.

Director Jonathan Hock does a marvelous job introducing up to the NC State Wolfpack players and their charismatic coach. Jim Valvano seemed more like an entertainer than a coach, but he had the skills and vision to lead the Wolfpack to an unlikely victory. And then another one. And another one. And even more after that. The Wolfpack survived nine elimination games, seven of which they were losing with a minute left to play. They were able to beat the top ranked college teams, defeating legendary players like Michael Jordan, Sam Perkins, Clyde Drexler, and Akeem Olajuwon. Check it out if you can. It’s inspirational, motivational, and well worth watching.

Critically Rated at 13/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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There’s Always a Peanut

So I was just pooping (that’s something that I do at least once a day, maybe twice or more) and it dawned on me that no matter what I eat there’s always a peanut in my shit. Granted, I don’t study my stool on a regular basis, but I always notice a peanut when I glance at my bowel movement. Maybe it’s not a peanut, maybe it just looks like one, but I’m not going to go to great lengths to determine if it’s really a peanut or not. I’ll just assume that it’s a peanut so that I can joke about how there’s always a peanut.

Critically Rated at 13/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Star Trek Into Darkness

Star Trek Into Darkness is a 2012 sci-fi film, and the twelfth cinematic installment of the Star Trek series. It’s a sequel to 2009’s Star Trek reboot and it’s once again directed by J.J. Abrams (so get ready for lens flares!). Chris Pine, Zachary Quinto, Zoe Saldana, Simon Pegg, Karl Urban, and John Cho all reprise their roles, and Benedict Cumberbatch, Alice Eve, and Peter Weller join the cast. The film made $467,381,584 at the international box office, which is good enough to make it the highest grossing Star Trek film. Avatar made $2,787,965,087. Basic math tells us that Avatar is 5.965% better than Star Trek Into Darkness.

The basic plot of Star Trek Into Darkness involves Captain Kirk and Commander Spock matching wits with Kahn, a genetically engineered superhuman. If that sounds familiar, it’s because it’s the basic plot of Star Trek II: The Wrath of Kahn. It’s more of a rehash/remix than a virtual retelling, but it pays homage to the Star Trek movies/episodes that came before it. There’s even a reference to tribbles.

I enjoyed this movie until someone pointed out that it’s not advancing the plot from 2009’s Star Trek. The entire crew was fully assembled and ready to go on adventures by the end of that movie. J.J. Abrams didn’t know how to proceed, so he chose to dismantle the crew at the beginning of the sequel so that they could reassemble by the end of the flick. It’s almost the same movie, only with new characters and a different villain with a different motive. It’s still entertaining; it’s just not moving the franchise forward. Oh well, I’m more of a Star Wars fan than a Trekkie anyway. Bring on Episode VII!

Critically Rated at 12/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Blackfish

Blackfish is 2013 documentary about the dangers of keeping orcas in captivity. The film focuses on a male killer whale named Tilikum, and how he was whalenapped from his pod and forced into a tank with other killer whales that constantly asserted their dominance over him at night, while being forced to perform tricks in front of thousands of screaming fans during the day. Tilikum’s biggest claim to fame is the fact that he’s responsible for the deaths of three people.

This documentary was seen as a devastating expose on aquatic amusement parks. SeaWorld suffered from a lot of bad publicity and a huge loss of profits from people boycotting their parks. You can’t watch this film and not be affected by it. The filmmakers might have skewed some facts, but you can’t deny that SeaWorld relies on animal slavery as a business model. It was only a matter of time before the world finally realized it.

Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Ordering a Pizza From Domino’s Online

It’s a rainy day and I’m feeling lazy so I felt like ordering a pizza. I wanted something cheap and fast, so I chose Domino’s. I haven’t had their pizza in a while and I felt like they deserved another shot. I went to their website and saw that they’ve elaborated their online ordering. It makes it really easy to build and customize your pizza. There’s a virtual picture of your pizza that displays your toppings so you can see what the pizza will actually look like. You can see if pepperoni and bacon looks better than sausage and mushrooms. As soon as you place the order, you can follow the action with the Domino’s Tracker. It tells you when the order was placed, when they started prepping it (Antonio started making my order at 3:39 pm), when they started baking it (Antonio put it in the oven at 3:49 pm), when they perform the quality check, and when they start to deliver it. Right now it’s only 3:53 pm so I don’t know if the pizza tastes good or not, but I’m pretty impressed with ordering a pizza from Domino’s online. I will definitely do this again.

Critically Rated at 15/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Django Unchained

Django Unchained is a 2012 Tarantino flick. It fact, it’s Quentin Tarantino’s highest grossing film to date. It’s not his best film, but it’s worth watching (all his films are). It’s about a slave named Django who teams up with a bounty hunter. They go around killing bad guys and collecting bounties while searching for Django’s wife in an effort to free her. It’s an interesting story but it’s not as structured as Tarantino’s other films. It’s more rambling and loose, and it feels almost as if he was trying to stretch out the running time. Granted it’s Tarantino, so it’s never boring. There’s always tremendous dialog, beautiful visuals, an epic soundtrack, and glorious violence. It’s a great movie. It’s just not quite a masterpiece.

Jamie Foxx plays Django and he’s good and all, but Christoph Waltz carries the movie as Dr. King Schultz. Schultz is arguably the main character. He’s the one that sets the story in motion. He frees Django, he teaches him how to become a bounty hunter, and he helps him find his wife. This movie has tremendous actors in it. Jamie Foxx, Leonardo DiCaprio, Samuel L. Jackson, Kerry Washington, etc. all had solid performances, but the movie wouldn’t have worked without Christoph Waltz. He won the Oscar and Golden Globe for Best Supporting Actor, and it was well deserved.

You can’t claim to be a movie lover if you don’t watch Tarantino movies. You don’t have to like them, but you have to experience them. Tarantino watches films, studies them, analyzes them, and incorporates certain aspects of great films into his films. He pays homage to classic cinema while simultaneously pushing the boundaries forward. Yeah, he overuses the N-word and has a foot fetish. He’s still a true artist and you can’t deny his impact on cinema and pop culture.

Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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People Who Don’t Know How to Eat Buffalo Wings

Buffalo wings are delicious. They are spicy, they are messy, and they are sometimes all you can eat. And a surprising number of people don’t know how to eat them. They leave way too much meat on the bone, and that’s a waste of a wing. Luckily there are lots of YouTube videos and life hack instructions that teach you how to properly eat chicken wings. It’s all about deboning the wing by twisting and removing the bones, leaving a fully edible hunk of meat behind that you can simply pop into your mouth. It’s important to be efficient, you don’t want to waste food. There are starving kids in Africa, and eating all your food helps them somehow. I included a video of a hot Hooters girl teaching you how to debone buffalo wings. I hope it helps you.

Critically Rated at 6/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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