Tag Archives: sips

Beer Theft

I had a shitty shift the other night so I went out for drinks with two coworkers. This bar is like our Cheers, we own that spot. The bartenders know us by name and they know what we drink. We bought a round, sat at our usual table, raised our glasses, and started drinking. We finished the first round and ordered another. After a few sips, someone suggested a smoke break and it seemed like a great idea. My friend and I were drinking draft IPA, my other buddy had a bottle of cider, and we each put a coaster on the top of our drinks. That’s the international sign for I’m Coming Back so Don’t Touch my Drink. We went outside and did our thing, and when we came back inside the beer glasses were empty with the coasters strewn aside. The cider remained untouched so I know it wasn’t a freak act of nature or an alcoholic ghost. No man, we got beer jacked. Our beers were practically full, but it was obvious that we had sipped from them. Somebody stole our used beer. I didn’t even know that people could stoop that low. That’s like somebody siphoning your gas in your own driveway. You feel used, violated, and scared to trust anyone ever again. Beer theft happens. Be aware.

Critically Rated at 1/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Grabbing the Wrong Drink

You’re at a party and having a good time. You set your plastic keg cup down for a second and when you go to pick it back up you notice three other identical cups in the vicinity. You can’t remember which one is yours, so you grab the fullest cup and start drinking. A few sips in you realize that it isn’t yours. Fuck it, alcohol kills germs anyway. Grabbing the wrong drink isn’t the biggest mistake you can make.

Critically Rated at 11/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Filed under Drinks