Tag Archives: naked

Nude Scenes in Movies

I had a lengthy conversation with a couple of strangers at the bar today. We didn’t talk about sports or politics. We discussed nude scenes in movies. More specifically, which sexy Hollywood actresses were naked in a movie, which movie(s), how much you see, and what was depicted in those scenes. I don’t know how the conversation started, but we talked for a long time. We learned from each other. We kept naming different movies and actresses and what to watch on Netflix as soon as possible, but never once did we mention anything about the cinematography. And we knew surprisingly little about the plot details of the movies we were mentioning. That’s what happens when you only watch a few select scenes I guess. The next time there’s a lull in the conversation you should bring up nude scenes in movies. Awkward silence avoided. You’re welcome.

Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

Showgirls-1995-movie-poster

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Naked and Afraid (TV Show)

Naked and Afraid is a Discovery Channel reality show. Each episode follows two survivalists (a guy and a girl) spending twenty-one days in the wilderness naked. They really are naked and afraid, get it? The survivalists are strangers and they first meet each other in the wilderness and in the buff. They each get to bring one item along. Most of the time they take a fire starter or a machete, but one bitch brought a pot. Of all the things that you can bring, she brought a fucking pot. Oy. So they get dropped off in the wilderness and then they have to get to know each other while building a shelter, starting a fire, and looking for food. Some of the personalities are bound to conflict and that makes for some good reality TV.

Naked and Afraid goes all over the world. They go to jungles, remote islands, swamps, coasts, deserts, and grasslands. Each episode is always two new survivalists, so there are always new characters to love or hate and it always seems fresh. It’s not a contest. They aren’t trying to compete. They are just trying to survive the wilderness and each other for three weeks. Sometimes they get along great, and sometimes they butt heads. Sometimes they succeed, and sometimes someone taps out. It’s always entertaining. It proves that nudity makes reality shows better.

Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Naked Berry Blast

Naked Berry Blast is a 100% juice smoothie with no added sugar, no preservatives, and it’s also vegan and gluten free. Despite all those drawbacks, it’s still a tasty beverage. Each Naked smoothie has an itemized breakdown of the fruits included. Berry Blast has 5 blackberries, 4 raspberries, 4 strawberries, 3 ½ apples, and ½ banana. You can taste the berries more than you can taste the apples and the banana. Blackberries and raspberries go well together, and strawberries make everything better, so it’s a pretty solid flavor medley. It tastes good and it’s good for you. It’s hard to beat that kind of winning combination.

Critically Rated at 15/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Walking Around Naked Just Because You Can

I’m not a nudist but sometimes I pretend to be. If my roommates are gone and I’m home alone, I’ll walk from my bedroom to the bathroom and back again while completely in the buff. It’s easier and more fun than putting on pants. Walking around naked just because you can is a liberating feeling. You deserve to be comfortable and clothes are so restricting. Just avoid walking by open windows and going outside to get the mail. Nobody wants to see your flaccid wiener. And it’s creepy if they do. Nudity is nothing to be ashamed of, but a flaccid wiener is. It’s not that impressive. I’m a grower, not a shower. Don’t judge me.

Critically Rated at 15/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Filed under Random Rants

Naked Peach Guava + Coconut Water

Naked makes all natural fruit juices, made with 100% juice and no sugar added. It’s healthy and delicious, not to mention it’s also gluten free, has no preservatives, and is vegan. But I don’t care about all the health bullshit, I care if it tastes good or not. And it tastes good. I got the Peach Guava + Coconut Water blend. It has ¾ of a peach, ¾ of a guava, ½ of a coconut’s water, 1/3 of a mango, ¾ of an orange, and ¾ of an apple. The peach, guava, and mango makes it tastes tropical, the coconut water gets kind of muted, but it makes the medley more refreshing. And it’s fun to say that I got Naked at the store. Or that I got Naked with your mom and she swallowed my sweet sticky juice. I can keep going with this. There’s nothing wrong with getting Naked. You should get Naked too and see what all the fuss is about. Everyone should get Naked and we can have a huge Naked party.

Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Filed under Drinks