Tag Archives: comedy

Hot Shots! (film)

Jim Abrahams (Airplane!) directs this Top Gun parody starring Charlie Sheen, Cary Elwes, Lloyd Bridges, Jon Cryer, Kevin Dunn, and Valeria Golino. This was made back in the days when parody films were actually smart and clever, before it devolved into shit like Epic Movie and Vampires Suck. You have to respect the source material if you’re going to make a funny parody. You can’t just slap scenes and gags together to lengthen the film’s running time.

Hot Shots! actually has a plot. Topper Harley (Charlie Sheen) is a top Navy pilot with some daddy issues. He’s a natural pilot but is self-destructive, something that his therapist/love interest (Valeria Golino) tries to help him with. Cary Elwes plays a rival pilot feuding with Topper. His future Two and a Half Men co-star Jon Cryer also plays a fellow pilot and Kristy Swanson walks around in a bra, which is nice.

Even though this is a parody, it’s still a pretty solid film. It has a real plot, the characters actually develop, and the end result is an 83% approval rating on Rotten Tomatoes. Compare that to the 2% and 4% rating for Epic Movie and Vampires Suck. There is a joke or a gag every few seconds and most of them are hysterical. But there is also continuity to the jokes. When Lloyd Bridges spits pudding on Kevin Dunn’s face, the pudding stays on his face until he wipes it away. There is a Chihuahua that has the unfortunate habit of getting sat on. The funniest jokes are reoccurring ones.

Charlie Sheen carries the picture. He’s kind of like a younger Leslie Nielsen: they are both comedic actors, but they aren’t really comedians. They both have a deadpan delivery while doing the absurd. Hot Shots! isn’t as funny as Airplane!, but that’s a tough act to follow.

Critically Rated at 12/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Kel Mitchell

If you experienced the ‘90s at all, you might remember Kel Mitchell. He was one half of the teenaged Kenan and Kel comedy troupe. He’s skinny one who likes orange soda. I feel bad for Kel because he did it wrong. Kenan did it right. Kenan Thompson was able to transition from absurd kid sketch comedy to adult sketch comedy on SNL. Kel transitioned from being a child star to being a footnote in mediocre productions. Kel still has a career. Just not much of one.

Critically Rated at 8/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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South Park

Matt Stone and Trey Parker are the creative minds behind Team America: World Police, Orgazmo, The Book of Mormon (the Broadway smash, not the foundation of the religion), and South Park. South Park is one of the best cartoon shows ever. It is funny on every level. It is crude, controversial, satirical, and always hilarious. The show follows Stan, Kyle, Kenny and Cartman, four friends growing up in South Park, Colorado.

Stan Marsh is the everyman. He is the most normal of the friends, and he’s usually the voice of reason. Kyle Broflovski is also relatively normal, but he’s Jewish and Cartman won’t let him forget it. Kenny McCormick is the unlucky one of the group. Not only is he poor, he has an unfortunate habit of dying (especially in the first few seasons). Eric Cartman is the fat asshole of the group. He is racist, manipulative, a brat, and a terrible person in general… He’s also the fan favorite and a majority of the best episodes revolve around him.

There are a lot of great supporting characters, way to many to list them all. So I will just mention Butters, Jimmy, Timmy, Token, Towelie, Chef, and Mr. Hanky the Christmas Poo. And Kyle’s mom’s a bitch.

There have been 230 episodes over 16 seasons. That’s pretty fucking impressive. The show was a hit from the start, but it took a few seasons for the show to find its groove. The early seasons are kind of hard to watch now. The show gradually became more bold and distinctive. Scott Tenorman Must Die is the episode when South Park truly became South Park. That’s also the point where you learned that Cartman is capable of anything and you don’t want to be on his bad side.

The animation style looks intentionally shitty. The characters look like paper cut-outs (the pilot actually was filmed with paper), but it is all computer animated so they can churn out episodes in 6 days. An episode of the Simpsons can take 6 months to produce in comparison. The result is that South Park can be topical. And they have fun with that. They will mention sports scores and spoof news events just because they can. It’s pretty amazing to think that they are creative enough to write a script, animate it, record and add the dialog, add sound effects and music, do rewrites, and edit it within a week’s time. And then everyone will be quoting it around the water cooler that next day.

Trey Parker is a genius. And Matt Stone is lucky that he knows Trey Parker. And we are all lucky that Trey Parker gave us South Park and the South Park movie. When South Park first came out, my cable provider didn’t carry Comedy Central. I had never seen an episode of South Park before I saw Bigger, Longer, and Uncut. My head practically exploded.

South Park is a great TV show. It challenges everything and everyone. You can’t get too offended though. It’s South Park. That’s what they do. You never know that to expect with each new episode of South Park. They don’t even know what to expect. It’s guerrilla art.

Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed By Brendan H. Young.

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Saving Silverman

Saving Silverman is a comedy about two friends trying to rescue their friend from a miserable relationship. Steve Zahn and Jack Black play Wayne and J.D. and Jason Biggs plays the titular Darren Silverman. Amanda Peet plays the succubus, Amanda Detmer plays Darren’s long lost love, and R. Lee Ermey plays their old football coach. Dennis Dugan (Big Daddy, Happy Gilmore) is in the director’s chair. It’s a stupid movie about stupid people, but it’s funny and that’s what a comedy should be.

Darren, Wayne, and J.D. are best friends since the fifth grade. They share a common obsession with Neil Diamond and are in a Neil Diamond tribute band. They spend their days drinking beers and hanging out and having fun. That all changes when Darren meets Judith (Amanda Peet). Judith is a controlling, manipulative psychologist who has Darren wrapped around her finger. She can’t stand J.D. and Wayne and forbids Darren from hanging out with them anymore.

Wayne and J.D. want their friend back and decide they have to save Darren at any cost. The best and most logical thing to do is to kidnap Judith and set up Darren with Sandy, his long lost love from high school. The two friends capture Judith and lock her up in their garage, leaving a fake note for Darren saying that she ran away and doesn’t want to marry him. Darren is distraught and misses her, but Wayne convinces him to go out with Sandy. He’s relieved to know that Sandy is preparing to take her final vows to become a nun, and he relaxes around her. They catch up on old times, they share laughs, they have a moment, and sparks fly.

Wayne and J.D. have their hands full with their cunning captive. She outsmarts them and escapes a few times. She analyzes J.D. and makes him realize his homosexuality. While his two best friends are holding his kidnapped fiancée hostage, Darren and Sandy are falling in love. She even decides to leave the convent for him. And Darren is finally happy again.

But of course Judith escapes, Darren goes back to her, Sandy goes back to the convent, and Wayne and J.D. go to jail. Darren and Judith are about to get married and Sandy is about to become a nun, but Wayne and J.D. escape from jail with the help of their old football coach. They save Sandy from her nun vows, then they kidnap Neil Diamond, then they all go to stop the wedding. Darren ends up with Sandy, Judith ends up with Wayne, and J.D. ends up with their old football coach.

This is a stupid movie. But it’s a cult classic now. Jack Black and Steve Zahn have a lot of great moments and quotable lines. They are also eight and ten years older than Jason Biggs. Jason Biggs looked too young to be their friend, he was a little miscast. His role isn’t that important either. Wayne is the main character, he is the one who calls all the shots, he opens the movie, and he’s the one trying to save Silverman.

If you weren’t a Neil Diamond fan going in to this movie, you will be when you come out. Be prepared for that.

Critically Rated at 10/17

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Super Troopers

Super Troopers is a cult comedy classic about a group of highway patrolmen who pass the time terrorizing innocent civilians and abusing their power. They are the high school teacher who confiscates your stash and smokes in in the teacher’s lounge. It was written by and stars the Broken Lizard comedy group: Jay Chandrasekhar (who also directs), Kevin Heffernan, Steve Lemme, Paul Soter, and Erik Stolhanske.

The movie’s opening scene is one of the funniest scenes in cinema. Two of the Vermont State Troopers, Thorn and Rabbit (Chandrasekhar and Stolhanske) pull over three stoners and fuck with their heads. It’s the perfect introduction to the Super Troopers and how they run their stretch of highway.

If there’s anything that the troopers hate more than crime, it’s the local Spurbury Police Department. The troopers are facing budget cuts, while the SPD gets all the glory and job security. The troopers stumble into a potential drug smuggling operation and soon after a body turns up that could possible be connected.

The troopers must uncover the mystery before the SPD does. But it turns out that the SPD are in on the operation and provide protection for the smugglers. Can the Super Troopers get their shit together and expose the corrupt cops? You’ll just have to watch and find out.

Super Troopers starts out as a great comedy. The opening scene is hilarious, but it all goes downhill from there. It stops being funny about halfway through the movie when they have to actually advance the plot. There are quite a few funny scenes and moments, but 85% of them happen in the first forty-five minutes. A good comedy should be consistently funny and that’s where this movie fails. It loses steam and momentum and you stop paying attention after a while.

Super Troopers Pic

Kevin Heffernan steals the film as Farva. His exchange with the cashier at the Dimpus Burger where he demands a liter of cola is another highlight of the film. All of the cast members have their moments, but Farva is the stereotypical asshole cop, and it’s fun to hate him.

Broken Lizard has made a few other movies, like Club Dread, Beer Fest, and The Slammin’ Salmon. Super Troopers is their best and most well known flick. Beer Fest is pretty funny. Club Dread was terrible but had it’s moments, and the Slammin’ Salmon was a disappointment but better than Club Dread. Broken Lizard will never be Monty Python. If they aren’t careful, advertising their films with their name will be a deterrent to moviegoers (the M. Night Shyamalan effect).

Super Troopers is a cult classic comedy because of the first forty-five minutes or so. Then it starts to suck. There are a lot of great bits and quotable lines, and it’s got a lot of memorable parts… but it’s not a complete movie. It becomes tired and predictable and it doesn’t deserve to be listed as one of the best comedies of all time. Because it’s not. The first half is great, the second half is mediocre. I don’t know how many times I have to stress that.

Critically Rated at 11/17

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Bruce Almighty

Tom Shadyac (Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, Liar Liar) directs this religious comedy about a guy who criticizes God and gets all His powers for a week to see if he can do a better job. Jim Carrey is Bruce Nolan, a TV reporter who thinks he is better than he is. He doesn’t get a promotion and he has a hissy fit and he ends up with godlike powers that he uses for selfish reasons before learning not to be selfish and losing his godlike powers. People in Hollywood do a lot of drugs.

Bruce Nolan is a reporter who hopes to be an anchorman, but nobody takes him seriously because he does human-interest stories and flails about like Jim Carrey. He lives with his girlfriend Grace (Jennifer Aniston) and has a pretty decent life but he doesn’t seem to realize it and he complains all the time. His co-worker Evan (Steve Carell) gets promoted to anchorman and Bruce has a little breakdown and challenges God.

God arranges a meeting between the two of them, and Bruce meets God face to face. God looks a lot like Morgan Freeman. God gives Bruce his powers for one week. The only rules are that he can’t tell anyone that he’s God and he can’t interfere with free will.

Bruce uses his powers to get revenge on people who wronged him, to get laid, to get promoted, to get famous… he pretty much abuses his powers in every way possible. He becomes aware that he can hear people praying and asking for help. He starts to help them out but then he decides it’s easier to just say yes to their prayers rather than paying attention to what they are wishing.

Bruce’s actions have consequences. And he’s God, so his actions have really big consequences. Bad things start to happen, both in Bruce’s personal life and with the rest of the world. Grace leaves Bruce and Bruce tries to get her back, but he can’t interfere with free will, so his attempts to get her back don’t work.

Bruce eventually realizes that being God is kind of hard and maybe he shouldn’t be so critical. And wouldn’t you know it, but he gets a second chance with Grace. So you can do everything wrong and fuck up the world and still get a second chance at happiness because you deserve it, damn it.

This movie is funny and it made a lot of money, but it’s not one of Jim Carrey’s better movies. Religious comedies are a weird genre of cinema, but Life of Brian is the best one. Bruce Almighty is too family friendly to be funny.

They made a shitty sequel with Steve Carell’s character called Evan Almighty. I’m surprised they haven’t made a shittier sequel with Morgan Freeman’s character called God Almighty.

This movie has some good scenes, but Bruce isn’t a likeable main character. Grace should have left him. He is an asshole. He becomes totally powerful and uses that power to instinctively help himself. He is a selfish motherfucker and Evan deserved the raise over Bruce from the start.

If an ordinary guy became God, no doubt crazy shit would happen. And some weird stuff does happen in this movie, but they could have done a lot more. There are infinite ideas to explore and it seems like they were holding themselves back to be more of a kid’s movie. Tom Shadyac used to make movies where Jim Carrey talked out of his butthole… they definitely lost some edge.

Critically Rated at 9/17

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The Hangover Part II

Todd Phillips returns to direct Bradley Cooper, Ed Helms, and Zach Galifinakis in The Hangover Part II. The Hangover was was an amazing movie, it was totally unexpected and out of the blue. The Hangover Part II is a complete retread and copies almost everything that the first one does and puts a slight twist on it.

Two years after the events of the first film, the Wolf Pack is reunited to celebrate Stu’s upcoming wedding. Ed Helms is the guy getting married in this movie, and even though Doug (Justin Bartha) isn’t getting hitched this time and can actually join in the fun, he is still shunned and ignored and has no bearing on the plot. Justin Bartha needs to fire his agent.

Stu is getting married to Lauren, and the Wolf Pack and Lauren’s little brother Teddy have a toast on the beach with some sealed beers. The next morning they wake up and Teddy has disappeared and they find themselves duplicating the events of the first film without realizing that they have done all the same shit before.

Ed Helms, Bradley Cooper, and Zach Galifinakis stumble their way through their way through the plot, periodically spitting out semi-memorable one liners. They are trying to find out where Teddy is, and each time time they get closer to finding out his location, they get face another setback.

Ken Jeong returns as Chow, in an even bigger and more exposed role. He plays a bigger character, he actually effects the plot.

The Hangover sequel borrows heavily from the plot of the original. You can deduce what will happen and when it will happen and if you are surprised than you are an idiot and can’t pay attention. This movie is a comedy. It’s not trying to fool you.

The movie is funny but it’s not as funny as the original. They are trying to recapture the feel of the first by completely copying each scene with a slight variation. Instead of finding a baby, they find a monkey. Not the same, and not as funny.

You are trying to pretend that it’s funny and that you like it. But you are lying to yourself. It’s like going skydiving for the second time… you are just going through the motions and the thrill is gone. It’s not as great as you remember, because it was totally new the first time.

The Hangover is a great comedy. It’s funny and original. The Hangover Part II is a decent sequel to a great comedy. It’s less funny and less original. It’s tired. It’s a rehash. It’s a YouTube sequel. You could have made a better follow-up and you didn’t and I hate you for that.

Critically Rated at 11/17

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Boy Meets World

When I was a kid, Friday nights were reserved for ABC’s TGIF lineup. Boy Meets World was one of my favorite shows growing up. I grew up watching that show. Ben Savage is Cory Matthews, the Boy who meets the World for seven seasons, taking him from middle school to high school to college. The first couple of seasons were grounded in reality and it was a family show. Then something happened and the show became self-referential and a parody of itself. And it was awesome.

Cory Matthews is a regular kid growing up in Philadelphia. He lives with his parents Alan and Amy (William Russ and Betsy Randle), his older brother Eric (Will Friedle), and his younger sister Morgan (played by Lily Nicksay and later Lindsay Ridgeway). He spends his days hanging out with his best friend Shawn Hunter (Rider Strong) and later on with his girlfriend Topanga (Danielle Fishel). He lives next door to his perpetual teacher, Mr. Feeny (William Daniels).

At first Cory deal with issues like falling asleep in class and failing a test, thinking his mom is having an affair before realizing it’s a misunderstanding, and dealing with an embarrassing haircut. In later seasons the storylines become absurd: Eric goes to Hollywood and joins the cast of Kid gets Acquainted with Universe for an episode, Cory becomes a WWII soldier who gets amnesia, Shawn gets into college.

This really isn’t a good show. If I didn’t grow up watching it, I probably wouldn’t like it. But I did grow up watching it, and so if I’m channel surfing and catch it, I have to watch it. It’s a curse.

The show has a hazy sense of continuity. Topanga had an older sister that disappeared and she became an only child. Shawn had an older sister and a half-brother that both disappeared, but that’s cool because later he got another half-brother (Matthew Lawrence) who became a cast member. Cory’s sister disappeared for a season and came back as a different actress. Mr. Turner (Anthony Tyler Quinn) was a big character for a while, and then he got in a motorcycle accident and never showed up on camera again. Minkus (Lee Norris) was the stereotypical nerd and he also vanished for a few seasons before he popped up when they graduated from high school.

When you’re watching the show season by season you can see that it gets really bizarre. My guess is that they replaced the writers with people who had never seen the show. They just made up backstories and histories to spice up episodes, and never bothered to see if it conflicted with continuity.

The show was on from September 24, 1993 until May 5, 2000. This show was the 90’s. You get to see Cory and Shawn grow up, both physically and emotionally. They had to revamp the show a few times, and it jumped the shark quite a few times. But people love to watch a train wreck, so they kept coming back each week, for seven seasons. You can’t deny that it’s a cult classic. It’s no Saved by the Bell, but it’s still a staple of my generation’s childhood.

Critically Rated at 12/17

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Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

Will Ferrell makes Will Ferrell movies, and Anchorman is his best. Adam McKay (Talladega Nights, Eastbound & Down) directs and co-wrote the script with Will Ferrell, who stars as stars as Ron Burgundy, the best anchorman in San Diego. Paul Rudd, Steve Carell, David Koechner, and Christina Applegate costar, and Judd Apatow produces.

Ron Burgundy is the best damn anchorman in San Diego. He’s number one and isn’t afraid to let everyone know it. His Channel 4 News team is made up of meteorologist Brick Tamland (Steve Carell), sportscaster Champ Kind (David Koechner), and field reporter Brian Fontana (Paul Rudd). Brick is legally retarded, Champ has man crush on Ron Burgundy, and Brian fancies himself a ladies man, but doesn’t have much luck. It’s a happier and lighter style of reporting, showcased by the ongoing reports on Ling-Wong the pregnant panda.

Things are going great for a while, but it’s the ‘70s and times are changing. Veronica Corningstone (Christina Applegate) is the first female reporter hired at the station, and she has to deal with the immature men and blatant sexism as she battles for respect. Her and Ron get together and start a relationship, but it’s doomed because she’s looking forward to the future and Ron is stuck in the past.

One day Ron has a run-in with an angry biker who kicks Ron’s dog Baxter off a bridge. Ron is too distraught to report the news, so Veronica fills in and nails it. Ron is hurt and betrayed that Veronica would read his news and ends their relationship. There’s no denying Veronica’s talent and she is promoted to co-anchor.

Ron and his news team try to get rid of her in various ways, but Veronica sabotages Ron’s teleprompter so that he says, “Go fuck yourself San Diego”. You generally can’t say shit like that on TV, so Ron gets fired and Veronica becomes the lead anchor.

After a few months, Ron is just a drunk, but Veronica is more famous and successful than Ron ever was. One day Ling-Wong the pregnant panda finally starts to give birth, so the all of San Diego’s media shows up for the story of the year. Veronica gets shoved into a bear pit by a rival anchor that wants a good shot of Ling-Wong giving birth. When nobody can find Veronica, Ron Burgundy gets a chance to report once again.

Ron cleans himself up and shows up at the zoo to do some anchoring, but when he sees Veronica is in trouble, he jumps into the bear pit too. And just for good measure the rest of the news team jumps in too. Just when it seems like they are completely fucked, Baxter the dog shows up again. After he got kicked off the bridge by an angry biker, he had a fantastic journey to get back to Ron. He met a bear named Katow-jo, who coincidently happens to be the bear’s cousin, and so Ron and Veronica and the Channel 4 news team is safe. Talk about deus ex machine.

Will Ferrell is hysterical but he plays the same character in every single movie. Anchorman was before he wore his shtick into the ground. But there’s no denying he is funny as hell. Anchorman would not have worked without Will Ferrell, but Paul Rudd, Steve Carell and David Koechner deserve a lot of the credit for making the movie one of the best comedies of that decade. Sex Panther… 60% of the time, it works every time. There are a lot of cameos: Vince Vaughn, Ben Stiller, Luke Wilson, Jack Black, Seth Rogan, Tim Robbins, and a few other celebs make appearances. The news team showdown is one of the highlights of the movie.

Judd Apatow movies are usually always good. He track record is almost as good as Pixar’s. Drillbit Taylor sucked but Cars 2 was no gem either. This is Will Ferrell’s best movie. I can’t wait for the sequel.

Critically Rated at 15/17

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Jerry Maguire

When Tom Cruise isn’t making a fool of himself in interviews he makes movies. A few years back Tom Cruise starred as Jerry Maguire in Cameron Crowe’s Jerry Maguire. It’s the best movie about a sports agent of all time, hands down. Cuba Gooding, Jr. and Renée Zellweger turn in supporting roles, and little Jonathon Lipnicki taught the world that the human head weighs eight pounds.

Jerry Maguire is a successful sports agent who feels that the business is getting out of hand. He writes a memo about how honesty and personal relationships are more important than money. His bosses think that money is important and Jerry gets fired.

Jerry decides to start his own sports agency. His only employee is Dorothy Boyd (Zellweger), a single mother who is inspired by Jerry’s memo. Jerry’s main investment is in Frank Cushman, the potential NFL #1 Draft Pick. His only other client is Rod Tidwell (Cuba Gooding, Jr.), a wide receiver for the Arizona Cardinals. On the night of the draft, Jerry finds out that his rival now represents Cushman, and Jerry is fucked.

Jerry hits a bit of a rut, breaks up with his fiancée and turns to Dorothy for comfort. He starts a relationship with her, but it’s complicated because she loves him, he doesn’t know if he loves her back, and she’s got a cute little kid that Jerry starts to love like a son.

Jerry invests all his time into helping Rod get a big contract. The two of them form a friendship, with Rod giving Jerry advice on marriage and love, and Jerry giving Rod advice on how to become a superstar.

By the end of the movie, Jerry is a happy and content family man. Rod gets his big contract. And you, the viewer, are happy for everyone.

Tom Cruise does a great job as Jerry Maguire. He’s a complex character; he’s incomplete but acts whole. He has good intentions but can’t always act on them. Cuba Gooding, Jr. elevates the film. Every scene with him interacting with Jerry is memorable. I have a feeling that Terrell Owens spent his career trying to be Rod Tidwell. Cuba won the Oscar for his performance and he celebrated by never making a decent movie again.

This was Renée Zellweger’s breakout role. And she actually looks good. In a lot of her movies she looks weird. She’s pretty, but she’s not Hollywood pretty. Jonathan Lipnicki plays Ray, Dorothy’s son. He’s a little scene-stealer. I want to punch him in the face though. Just to see what would happen.

Kelly Preston has a small role as Jerry’s fiancé. It’s a little bit of a stretch to pretend like she’s attracted to a homosexual scientologist, but she was able to pull it off. That’s acting (This is a very clever joke, because in real life she’s married to John Travolta, a scientologist who many believe to be a homosexual).

This movie came out in 1996 and people are still yelling, “Show me the money!” Shut the fuck up. This movie had a bunch of corny lines that people are still quoting: “You complete me” and “You had me at hello” are among the worst offenders. It’s a sign of a good movie when people constantly quote it.

Jerry Maguire is a good movie. It might be Tom Cruise’s best film. I don’t like Tom Cruise, so that’s a big compliment. There’s no denying that he’s a movie star. Jonathon Lipnicki might have been the cutest kid on the planet for a few short years. I still want to punch him in the face. This is a good movie, there’s sports for the guys and a love story for the girls, everyone wins.

Critically Rated at 14/17

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Ghostbusters II

If there’s something strange in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? Ghostbusters! I’m not trying to be clever, who else would you call? Who else is even a possibility? Harold Ramis, Dan Aykroyd, Ernie Hudson and Bill Murray are the Ghostbusters, and they’re back in their second film, again directed by Ivan Reitman. The first film is a classic; there is no denying that. But this is a great sequel, and I know a lot of people consider this blasphemy, but I think it is on par, or maybe even better than the original. That doesn’t mean it’s better, it means it’s more Ghostbustery.

The first film of a franchise generally spends a lot of time introducing and establishing characters. In sequels, you already know the main characters, so you can just jump right into the story. That’s how Ghostbusters II starts. It begins five years after the events of the first movie, and the Ghostbusters are no more. But this is a sequel, and the stakes have to be higher. Right of the bat, pink slime is creeping out of cracks in the sidewalk and Dana Barrett’s baby goes for a wild ride in his carriage. She goes to Egon and Ray for help, and the Ghostbusters reunite to find out what is going on.

What is going on is that the soul of a 17th Century tyrant is slowly regaining power and is threatening to take on a physical form and take over the world. That’s pretty shady. Vigo the Carpathian is a much more formidable opponent than a giant marshmallow man. I think that a scary painting that comes to life (who also controls a river of slime) is a little bit scarier than a demon that lives in a refrigerator and a giant candy mascot. Vigo uses Dana Barrett’s boss, Dr. Janosz Poha (Peter MacNicol), to try to kidnap Dana’s baby, Oscar. Oscar is going to the vessel, the body that Vigo will take over.

Naturally the Ghostbusters have a problem with this, and since Dana Barrett is a paying customer, they have to take him down. They discover a river of slime running underneath New York. They find out that the slime is a psyscho-reactive substance, a manifestation of negative emotions, and that it feeds off of angry, surly New Yorkers. The more pissed off and negative they are, the more powerful Vigo and his slime gets, and that in turn releases more and more ghosts. The Ghostbusters find out a way to use happy, positive emotions to control the slime, and use technology to animate the Statue of Liberty in order to fight the ghosts, because that makes total sense. Janosz successfully kidnaps Oscar, and the Ghostbusters have until 12:00 on New Year’s Eve to save the world.

There are a few reasons why this sequel is as good or better than the original. First off, everybody likes Slimer. And Slimer had a decent intro in the first movie, but he is actually helpful in this movie. He drives Louis to the museum, which was pretty important to advancing the plot. Slimer is the ghost mascot of the Ghostbusters, he was hardly in the first movie, but was featured prominently in the cartoon show and this sequel. There are better and more elaborate ghost-catching montages. Rick Moranis is awesome. And his character, Louis Tully, is expanded and has a lot more lines and scenes. He even gets some loving from Janine, the Ghostbuster’s secretary (who also has a bigger and better role to play). Even Ernie Hudson gets more screen time as Winston. Remember that there are four Ghostbusters, and Winston only showed up halfway through the first movie and didn’t do anything really. Winston is there from the get-go and has a cool first scene with Ray as they work a birthday party, establishing that they are now failures. He’s still not quite a lead, but his character actually involved in the plot now.

Vigo the Carpathian is a terrifying villain. He’s a creepy painting that slowly becomes more and more powerful throughout the film. The first movie uses demons named Zuul and Gozer, but you hardly see them. The destructor arrives in the form of the gigantic Stay Puft Marshmallow Man. I know it’s comedy, but that shit’s absurd even for the ‘80s. Vigo is scary. He even turns the comical Janosz into a disturbing henchman for the underworld… the scene were his eyes become headlights will forever be etched into my memory.

The first movie had great moments. It will always be a classic. But I think that this sequel did more to establish Ghostbusters as a franchise. There are a lot of iconic Ghostbusters moments in this one…. The Statue of Liberty, Slimer the Bus Driver, more Winston, more Louis, the river of slime, the courthouse ghosts, baby-eating bathtubs… the list goes on and on.

Ghostbusters is a great movie. Ghostbusters II is a great sequel and a great movie. They celebrate that they are back, and you are glad they are. And Bill Murray is reason enough to watch this movie. So watch it.

Critically Rated at 13/17

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Grown Ups

Adam Sandler, David Spade, Chris Rock, Rob Schneider, Kevin James, Maya Rudolph, Salma Hayek, and Maria Bello are Grown Ups…. Dennis Dugan directs this coming of age tale about a bunch of grown ups that have already become of age.

Adam Sandler plays the successful friend, the one who feels like he has to hide his social status from his friends. Kevin James plays the unsuccessful friend, the one who feels he has to hide his social status from his friends. Chris Rock plays the house husband, the one who feels he has to hide his social status from his friends. David Spade plays the perpetually single friend, the one who feels like he has to hide his social status from his friends. Rob Schneider plays the guy who likes older women, the one who feels like he needs to his social status from his friends.

If Chris Farley were still alive, he would play the same character as Kevin James and the movie wouldn’t suck as much. As it is, the movie sucks. It just seems likes Adam Sandler wanted to hang out with a bunch of SNL friends and make a mediocre movie. Mission accomplished. This movie kind of sucks.

There are a few good moments and redeeming qualities about this movie. They stress the importance of being a kid and being outdoors. If you are a kid, standing by a lake, and you have a smooth stone in your hand, you are obligated to skip that stone. It is an essential step to obtaining manhood. There are a lot of funny moments and moments that you can relate to. But this whole movie falls flat. It just seems rushed, like it’s a TV movie and not a theatrical production. It feels like they just tried filming a scene two or three times, called it a day and moved on. A lot of key moments just end up being unrelatable, but you see the genuine intent behind them.

This is not a great movie. It is not a bad movie. It is not a mediocre movie. It is an Adam Sandler movie, and it will make you laugh. It will not change your life; it will not affect your world. Watch it, enjoy it, like it, and move on. It’s funny, but isn’t required viewing.

Critically Rated at 11/17

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Jackass: The Movie

There aren’t too many TV shows that are able to make the transition to the big screen, much less be successful enough to spawn a few sequels. It’s even more impressive that a reality show could become a comedic cinematic franchise. There’s not even a plot or a theme, it’s just a bunch of clips. And it’s awesome.

Johnny Knoxville, Bam Margera, Ryan Dunn, Chris Pontius, Steve-O, Wee Man, Ehren McGhehey, Preston Lacy, Dave England and the late Ryan Dunn are a new breed of stuntmen. They play practical jokes on each other and on unsuspecting people, but they also do extremely dangerous stunts. Johnny Knoxville almost died a few times filming this movie. They also do painful things, like intentionally getting paper cuts on the webbing between their fingers and toes. I can still hear the whole theater groaning and squirming when Steve-O paper cuts the corner of his mouth.

Jackass is a rarity. It came out before YouTube was huge. I don’t think a group of friends could become movie stars filming themselves being dumbasses anymore. Johnny Knoxville sort of made the conversion to acting, he’s been in a lot of movies where he doesn’t have to get a concussion to get screen time. The rest of the Jackass crew are just having fun being young and stupid, and you can tell that their laughs are genuine. In Jackass Number Two, they are a little bit older, a little bit more extreme. You can tell they are starting to go through the motions. By the third one, they are looking a lot older, and they aren’t having as much fun. You can tell that it’s a paycheck movie, they don’t really want to be doing this shit anymore, they just have to because it’s their job. And Steve-O sucks when he’s sober.

Ryan Dunn is the heart of the Jackass crew. He did all the things that no one else wanted to do. Like sticking a toy car up his ass and acting mystified when the doctor shows him the X-rays. He seemed the most genuine of the guys. He didn’t have the ego that Johnny Knoxville or Bam Margera has, and only those two guys and Steve-O are more famous than him. It was pretty sad when he passed away. At least he won’t be forgotten.

Jackass: The Movie doesn’t need a plot or a story. There’s not denying that it has characters though. These guys are nuts, and they do dumb, dangerous and sometimes disturbing stunts and we get to sit back and laugh at them. Watch them movie if you haven’t yet, but I wouldn’t watch it with your grandma.

Critically Rated at 11/17

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Coming to America

John Landis directs Eddie Murphy in Coming to America. This is Eddie Murphy’s best movie, hands down. Eddie Murphy plays an African prince who comes to America in search of a bride. He brings his faithful manservant along, and hilarity ensues. Contrary to popular belief, Eddie Murphy does not play every single role in the movie. Eddie Murphy and Arsenio Hall each play four characters though. That’s a lot of comedy.

Murphy plays Prince Akeem. Arsenio Hall plays Semmi, his servant and friend. They come to Queens and land jobs at a McDonald’s clone called McDowell’s. Akeem falls for his boss’s daughter, but she already has a boyfriend. He keeps his regal status a secret, and eventually Lisa begins to notice him.

She gets rid of her boyfriend, and Akeem and Lisa start a relationship. Akeem’s parents show up, she finds out that he’s a prince, and she gets mad that he lied about being a goat herder and breaks up with him. Um, ok, why not? He goes back to Africa, and has to take part in an arranged marriage. When he lifts up his mystery bride’s veil, he sees that it is Lisa! Oh, what a happy ending.

This is a good movie with a good cast. Eddie Murphy and Arsenio Hall are at the top of their game, each playing multiple characters, and each one is funny. Eddie Murphy carries the movie, but it wouldn’t have been half as good without Arsenio Hall. They play off each other well; they should have made more movies together. James Earl Jones plays Akeem’s father, the King of Zamunda. Samuel L. Jackson, Louie Anderson and Cuba Gooding, Jr. have cameos. Shari Headley plays Lisa. She’s stunningly beautiful and I wonder why her career didn’t take off.

Eddie Murphy gets credit for coming up with the story, and David Sheffield and Barry W. Blaustein wrote the screenplay. Or did they? A guy named Art Buchwald wrote a script treatment for an Eddie Murphy vehicle in 1982. It went into development hell for a few years, and eventually was shelved. And then they made it in 1988 and Buchwald sued them. They settled out of court for an undisclosed sum. Pretty shady, but I think the studio is more to blame than Eddie Murphy.

This is a cult classic. It gave the world Sexual Chocolate and Soul Glow. It gave Eddie Murphy the idea he could do anything. It gave you a reason to forgive Eddie Murphy for shit like Pluto Nash and Norbit, and that’s saying something.

Critically Rated at 15/17

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Team America: World Police

The world is in trouble, and only Team America: World Police can save it. Trey Parker and Matt Stone created South Park, and they are back on the big screen again, and this time they have puppets. Trey Parker is a genius. Matt Stone is lucky he works with a genius.  And we get to watch what they create.

Team America is a parody of Michael Bay movies and other action films, done with marionettes. The puppets are top of the line, the sets are impressive and detailed, and the script is very witty and clever. But they never let you forget the fact that the characters are puppets. They play around with it, showing the puppets looking at real life Washington D.C. monuments, using regular house cats as jaguars, and even knocking a puppet over with the camera. The fight choreography looks like as amateur as you can get, but is hysterical because of the intense music they use.

An actor by the name of Gary Johnston is recruited to join Team America, because they believe he has the acting ability to save the world. He’s reluctant to join at first, but decides that he must give up his dreams for freedom. Meanwhile Kim Jong Il is planning a peace ceremony hosted by Alec Baldwin as a diversion to launch a global terror attack. Can Gary’s acting ability help Team America save the world?

Not only is this a great comedy, but it’s a terrific musical. There are some memorable songs like “America, Fuck Yeah”, “Freedom Isn’t Free”, “I’m So Ronery”, and the “Montage” song. “Freedom Isn’t Free” is one of the best country songs of the last ten years.

It’s a very political movie obviously, but you’ll notice they don’t bash George W. Bush. He’s not even mentioned in the movie at all. The opening scene in Paris where the team saves the day but destroys the city sums up how the world views Americans and how Americans view themselves. And there are hardcore puppet sex scenes.

This is a funny movie. It is a smart movie. It pisses a lot of people off, but it makes a lot of people happy. A good piece of art will be controversial. That’s what this movie is, art. Trey Parker is an artist. Matt Stone is lucky he knows an artist.

Critically Rated at 14/17

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Drumline

If you remember hard enough, you might recall that Nick Cannon was a moderately successful actor before Mariah Carrey ate him. Drumline was his masterpiece. You’ve seen the plot a million times before: a cocky kid with natural talent joins a team, clashes with them for a bit, learns about teamwork and grows up a little bit, and leads the team to victory. Along the way he meets a girl, gets her, loses her and gets her again when he leads the team to victory. The twist in the plot is that the kid with talent is good at drums and the team he joins is a college marching band. It’s not original in the slightest, but the music makes it entertaining.

Nick Cannon plays Devon Miles, a drummer who gets a full scholarship to join the prestigious and fictional Atlanta A&T University marching band. He’s a great drummer, music comes naturally to him. He is really cocky. I mean really cocky. There’s no reason why anyone would like this guy. He’s a dick. He’s selfish. He doesn’t bother learning how to read music, unlike all his fellow band members. He didn’t want to cut his hair as required by the team so he quit. He changes his mind a little later, shows up to a party with clippers and everyone cheers. Yeah right, fuck you man, you just quit the team like a bitch, but whatever, its ok because you’re good at drums. He challenges the student leader and questions authority. He is not a team player, and the film vilifies the few characters that treat Devon like the asshole that he is.

Zoe Saldana (Avatar, Star Trek) plays Laila, the love interest. There is no reason why she would possibly like Devon. First off, he’s a stupid freshman, and she is a sexy upperclassman. She has a car, doesn’t live in a dorm, and can legally drink. The first few times they meet he comes off as being really arrogant, stupid, and acts superior to her. There is no reason she would ever talk to him, let alone fall for him. Zoe Saldana is sexy even when she’s a nine foot tall sparkly blue cat.

The music and the marching sequences are the redeeming aspects of the movie. The band choreography and music selections are exciting and will have you tapping your feet to the beat. A good marching band runs like a machine, each part has to work perfectly or it sucks. You get a glimpse into how marching bands function.

So the plot sucks, but the movie is redeemed by the music. Nick Cannon sucks, but his character sucks even more. The supporting cast is much more interesting and likeable. It’s a very flawed movie, but if it’s on TV I wouldn’t bash you for watching it. I wouldn’t set the DVR for it though.

Critically Rated at 6/17

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Home Alone 2: Lost in New York

Mac is Back! Kevin McCallister is neglected by his parents once again, but this time he’s in the Big Apple, and he’s learning that being alone in a giant city is even more fun than being Home Alone in the suburbs. And for whatever unexplained reason Harry and Marv are free from jail and decide to go to NYC too. Good times will be had by all.

This is not a good movie. It is a good sequel in that it doesn’t shit on the original. Granted Home Alone is not a deep or clever movie, but it was fun and lighthearted, and this sequel captures the look and tone of the first one. It feels like a continuation, and not just another attempt to do the exact same thing to make more money. Ok, some parts are like that, but it’s still better than Hangover 2.

Kevin is a mischievous kid, but his heart is in the right place. He finds out that Harry and Marv plan on stealing donated money for a children’s hospital, and does what he can to stop them. He also befriends a homeless lady, and learns that she is a person, not just a scary pigeon lady. What a great message to send to kids: befriend homeless people and they will teach you valuable life lessons… about living on the street.

Not to brag or anything, but I did have a Talkboy. And it was not nearly as useful for hijinks as you would think. It was basically a waste of money. And time. I wish I still had it.

This movie has the whole “friendship knows no barriers” malarkey. There is also the whole “love between mother and son” vibe. As shitty of a mom as Catherine O’Hara is (how do you lose your kid twice in two consecutive Christmases?), she loves Kevin. She knows how scared he is, and she knows where to find him. As much as these movies are about Kevin being Home Alone, it is also about the lengths a mother will go through to get back to her son.

Critically Rated at 11/17

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