Tag Archives: toothbrush

March 31, 2016 · 2:22 pm

Spare Toothbrush

I brush my teeth at least twice a day because good hygiene is important and bad breath is gross. I have a toothbrush that stays in my bathroom. That’s my main toothbrush. I use it when I wake up and I use it before I go to bed. But I also keep a spare toothbrush in my work bag that’s saved me a few times, like when my roommate is hogging the bathroom and I’m trying to leave the house. Sometimes I’ll crash at a friend’s house instead of going home after a late shift and my trusty spare toothbrush is always there to keep me feeling fresh and clean. And sometimes I get the urge to brush after lunch just in case there’s anything stuck between my teeth. A spare toothbrush is almost as important as your main toothbrush. So you should get one if you don’t have one. Maybe get a little tube of toothpaste to go along with it. A toothbrush without toothpaste is pretty pointless.

Critically Rated at 13/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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November 26, 2015 · 1:02 pm

Leaving Your Toothbrush in a Weird Spot

Last night was the night before Thanksgiving, and that’s the most popular night to go out to a bar of the entire year. Needless to say, I went to the bar last night. And even more needlessly to say, I got a little buzzed. And by getting buzzed, I mean I got pretty drunk. I know because I couldn’t find my toothbrush when I woke up. It’s normally next to my tube of toothpaste in a cup by the side of the bathroom sink. It wasn’t there. It wasn’t in the medicine cabinet. It wasn’t in a random drawer. I was about to accuse my roommate of using it, losing it, or doing something unusual with it, when I decided to look for it some where else other than in the bathroom. I found it in my room, next to my computer. I can only assume that my drunk ass brushed my teeth while watching Netflix and decided to pass out in bed instead of putting it away. Leaving your toothbrush in a weird spot the night before means a frantic search the next morning. It’s not an ideal start to the day.

Critically Rated at 6/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

  

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August 5, 2014 · 2:48 pm

Using the Wrong Toothbrush

One of the most traumatic experiences from my childhood involved using the wrong toothbrush. My parents were thrifty and bought us one Sonicare toothbrush and gave us each a color-coded brush head. My older sister had blue, I had green, my younger sister had red, and the youngest had yellow. We had to take turns brushing our teeth, but that wasn’t a big deal because we all went to bed at different times. One day I saw my older sister using the green brush head, and I got mad and told her that the green one was mine. She denied it and said that I had the blue one and that she had been using the green one ever since we got it. I picked up the blue brush head and saw that the bristles were untouched and that it had never been used. I felt sick to my stomach. It’s bad enough if you find out that someone used your toothbrush once without you knowing. It’s much worse to find out that you’ve been sharing the same toothbrush with someone else, especially when it’s your sister. I felt dirty. I still do. I can’t look my sister in the eye to this day.

Critically Rated at 3/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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August 13, 2013 · 10:56 am

Staycation

So I haven’t written anything in a few days because I was on my staycation. A staycation is like a vacation in that you get time off from work, you relax, you do fun things, but you get sleep in your own bed at the end of the day. I’m lucky that I live in San Francisco and I was able to spend the last three days drinking and dancing and partying at Outside Lands. Most people don’t have the privilege of a major three-day festival a few blocks from their house, so their staycations involve a lot more yard work and trips to Home Depot. A staycation is a great way to take some time for yourself, to rediscover your sanity, and chill out without having to deal with all the hassles that come with planning a trip out of town. You don’t have to worry about locking the front door or forgetting your toothbrush. You don’t have to worry about transportation. A staycation is the ideal vacation for lazy people. It’s fun, it’s cheap, and you don’t have to think about work.

Critically Rated at 15/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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April 3, 2012 · 10:00 am

Flossing

It wasn’t enough that mankind has created toothbrushes, toothpaste, mouthwash, electric toothbrushes, and tooth picks. So we invented string for your teeth. Now we have another way to remove shit from between your teeth and cut your gums. The average person flosses only a few times a year: either when they just ate corn on the cob, or if they have a dentist appointment the next day. I have no idea why I lie to the dentist about flossing semi-regularly. He knows that I’m lying. Oh yeah, and apparently it’s not romantic to floss with your girlfriend’s hair. You live, you learn.

Critically Rated at 7/17

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