The world hates Americans for a lot of reasons. It used to be for oil consumption and war mongering. Now it’s primarily pink mustaches on cars. Why is this even a trend? Fake mustaches on girls are bad enough, but cars aren’t people. Cars are fucking cars. The only thing they should be wearing is a cool paint color and a coat of wax. Cars are expensive. You have monthly payments to the dealer, you have to pay for insurance, you have to get gas, there’s parking passes and permits and tickets to deal with… and you spend your hard-earned money on fake pink facial hair for its grill? You are a fucking douchebag. Your car looks stupid and you look like an asshole.
Who wants a mustache ride? Not me.
Critically Rated at 1/17
Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young