Tag Archives: jeans

Ripped Jeans 

 Ripped jeans are either really cool or really stupid. It all depends on where the rip is. If the knee is ripped, that’s stylish and hip. If the crotch is ripped, your day is probably ruined. I have a pair of jeans with frayed back pockets. I’m reluctant to keep my wallet in them, but they look fashionable so I wear them every now and then despite their diminished functionality. Some people buy news pairs of jeans that are already ripped. I don’t believe in that. I believe that rips should be earned. There should be a story behind them. You should rip your jeans while running from a mountain lion while hiking. You shouldn’t rip your jeans with scissors because Oprah says it’s trendy. I don’t know why denim looks good ripped, but it does. You don’t see people walking around with ripped cargo pants or ripped yoga pants. I have a theory that jean shorts were accidentally invented when a ripped knee got out of control.  

Critically Rated at 12/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Canadian Tuxedo

Jeans are awesome. They are the best type of pants. They are comfortable, they are durable, and they look good with almost anything. The only thing that jeans don’t go with is a jean jacket. Rocking a denim jacket with a pair of jeans is a fashion faux pas. It’s commonly called the Canadian tuxedo. Yes, there is such a thing as too much denim. I have no fashion sense whatsoever, but even I know to avoid the Canadian tuxedo. A Canadian tuxedo is like opening the Ark of the Covenant, it might be a gift from God but you will die if you look at it directly. Only a few people can get away with it (mostly Canadians, Europeans, and some celebrities), most people need to be aware of excessive denim in their outfits.

Critically Rated at 7/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Filed under Random Rants