Tag Archives: sporting event

Passing Cash Down to the Vendor

I went to the San Francisco Giants game the other week with my friend. We scored some pretty decent seats about twenty rows behind home plate. It was a hot day and we were stuck in the sun. There was no escape from the heat unless we left our seats, and we are gamers so there was no way that was happening. We were going to sit there and be miserable. And we were. We were both dripping with sweat by the second inning. Luckily a vendor came by with some ice-cold lemonade. We hailed him, ordered a couple of lemonades, he passed them down the row, and we passed cash over to him, and then he passed back our change. It dawned on me how weird passing cash down to the vendor really is. You are trusting random strangers with your money. That’s one of the only places where you do that. Try pulling that shit at McDonald’s and see what happens. The craziest part is that nobody ever takes advantage of it. Just once I would love it if somebody tried to pocket a five-dollar bill during an exchange. But I’ve never seen it happen. You would have to be pretty bold or pretty stupid to try something like that. You’d have no escape and multiple witnesses. I’d like to try it sometime. Not because I need the money, I just want to watch how people would react. Maybe I’ll try it the next time a Dodgers fan tries to buy a bag of peanuts, because fuck the Dodgers.

Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Free Tickets

Every now and then the universe decides that I need to have some fun and it rewards me with free tickets. Sometimes I get free concert tickets. Sometimes it’s movie tickets. And everyone knows that I’m a huge SF Giants fan, so I can usually snag free tickets from friends during baseball season. A free ticket is almost always a good thing. It allows you to escape from reality and the mundane for a few hours. You can’t complain about having a bad seat if you got a free ticket. It’s a better view than not being there. And it’s free so you’ll have more money to spend on food, booze, and souvenirs. And if you have extra free tickets, you can scalp those and have even more money for food, booze, and souvenirs. You should accept free tickets whenever the opportunity comes knocking.

Critically Rated at 15/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Beach Balls

Beach balls are inflatable balls that require your lungpower. You blow into a little rubber nipple thing, and you get slightly dizzy if you blow it up too fast. The name is kind of misleading. You never see beach balls at the beach. You typically see them at concerts, festivals, and the occasional sporting event. They are sometimes distracting, but you still hope it comes your way so you can swat it. I wonder if the guy who brings the ball gets mad when no one gives it back. I would be pissed, “NO ONE IS LEAVING UNTIL I GET MY FUCKING BEACH BALL BACK! WHO THE FUCK HAS IT?”

Critically Rated at 11/17

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