Announcing that you’re quitting a social media site is a transparently desperate plea for attention. I constantly see posts on Facebook and Twitter denouncing Facebook and Twitter: “Sorry guys, I’ve had enough. I’m leaving Facebook for good. Sorry, but e-mail me if you want to stay in touch. Ciao!” First off, shut the fuck up. Secondly, nobody will notice. Nobody cares. I mean nobody. Nobody will confront you on the street, asking why you won’t comment on their statuses or like pictures of their dog wearing people clothes. Nobody will miss your witty status updates or your impressive check-ins. Nobody likes them now, that’s probably why you’re quitting. But if you want to quit than quit. Just shut the fuck up about it.
Critically Rated at 3/17
Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young