Tag Archives: public

Clipping Your Nails in Public

Clipping your nails in public is one of the worst things a human being can do. It’s beyond disgusting. That kind of shit should only take place behind closed doors. Hygiene is important, but nobody wants to see you wipe your ass, nobody wants to see you using a Q-tip, and nobody wants to get one of your nail clippings in their eye. Oh, and don’t even get me started on the sound. That unique click-clack clipping sound causes cringes down my spine. I’ve seen old ladies clipping their nails on the bus. I’ve also yelled at old ladies to stop clipping their nails on the bus. I don’t understand how they think it’s ok to do that. I know I’m supposed to respect my elders, but I can’t respect them if they don’t have any sense of decency. It boggles my mind to know that some people can go through life oblivious to other people. It’s called courtesy. I just wish it was more common.

Critically Rated at 4/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Public Speaking

Speaking in public is an important social skill to have. A lot of people are terrified of public speaking, and it’s not a very enjoyable experience if you’re shy. But if you can’t read a few sentences out loud to a group of strangers, there is no way that you will be successful in life. How you present yourself is important in the business world. It’s important in any world. If you stammer or stutter, if you speak in a monotone or add the wrong inflection, then you weird people out. You need to speak with confidence. You need to speak clearly and correctly, but you also have to go with the flow. There will be times when you trip up on a word or somebody will ask a question that you don’t know how to respond to. A good public speaker will be able to turn a mistake into a triumph, to transform a gaffe into a memorable quote.

Public speaking takes time and it takes practice, but anybody is capable of learning how to do it. It’s not a natural thing, it’s sometime that you have to work on. Anyone can do it. Case in point: look at Bill Gates and Mark Zuckerberg. They are both awkward nerds, neither seems like they would be the life of the party, they are both introverted, and they had to learn the social skills that transformed their small companies into global forces. Microsoft and Facebook would not have gone anywhere if their CEOs didn’t learn the importance of public speaking and reading out loud. Neither are great public speakers, but when they speak they command attention. Not all billionaires can capture your attention like that. They learned the importance on public speaking and put they their skills to good use. Teach yourself how to read in public. Maybe it’s your time to shine now.

Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Stall Man

I am a stall man. I have nothing against urinals. I will use the urinal if I have to. But if I go into a public restroom and have a choice between a stall or a urinal, the stall will win every time. You have a greater sense of privacy. You can take your time and be a little more relaxed, sometimes your peter needs some time to get comfortable before anything starts flowing. There can be a little performance anxiety at the urinal sometimes, especially when other people are waiting in line. It’s kind of weird knowing that other guys are standing around watching and waiting for you to pee. The stall alleviates some of that pressure. Just try not to pee on the seat.

Critically Rated at 12/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Talking on the Phone on Public Transportation

If you are on the bus, train, ferry, or some other form of public transportation and your phone rings, you have two options. You can do the right thing and ignore the call, or you can answer your phone. It’s understandable to answer your phone. But you should mention right off the bat that you’re on the bus so you can’t really talk. You find out what they want and you end the conversation.  But if you answer and proceed to have a loud and glorified conversation for more than five minutes, you are blissfully ignorant of how rude and obnoxious you are. It’s even worse if you’re the one calling people on public transportation. You are scum and you should know that.

There’s this thing called Other People. You might want to continuously be yakking on your phone for thirty minutes, but Other People don’t want to be forced to eavesdrop on your lame but loud conversation. Other People don’t give a shit about your day, and they don’t want to hear about it.  No one wants to listen your stupid conversation about how drunk you were last night and how mean your boss was today because you were hungover. And you talk a lot of shit about your friends to whoever you’re talking to.

Who calls people anyway? It’s text or bust. Especially on the bus.

Critically Rated at 6/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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