I don’t like being bored. I always need to be doing something that stimulates my brain. I like reading. I like writing. I like watching TV and movies and listening to music. But sometimes I can’t do anything but count the holes on the ceiling. I just got back from the dentist and had to lie on my back for forty-five minutes while they poked and prodded and polished my teeth. Counting the holes in the ceiling was the only thing that I could do to keep from going crazy. You don’t want to actually count each individual hole, that will take forever. Start with one ceiling tile and count the number of holes in the first row and the first column, then multiply those numbers together and you will end up with the amount of holes per tile. Then you simply have to count all the tiles and multiply it by the amount of holes in one tile. The hard part is doing this all in your head and not losing track. It’s hard to do math without any paper or a calculator. You actually have to think. Even if you do succeed, it’s a hollow victory. Nobody cares how many holes are on the ceiling in your dentist’s office or that you counted them yourself.
Critically Rated at 8/17
Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young


