Tag Archives: DMV

Bad Driver’s License Photo

I had to go to the DMV a few weeks ago to renew my driver’s license. I had to take the eye exam, give them my thumbprint, and take a new picture. A few weeks passed and my new license arrived in the mail. I opened up the envelope and was instantly dismayed at how terrible my picture was. Or more specifically, at how terrible I looked in my picture. I look drunk, stoned, and hungover. I swear I was only one of the three. I didn’t like it at first. I considered going back to the DMV and seeing if they would retake the picture again Then I realized what a mistake that would be. If I ever get pulled over driving under the influence, the cop will take one look at my bad driver’s license photo, assume that I look fucked up all the time, and I’ll get off scot-free. If I use it wisely I’ll stay out of trouble… well, legal trouble at least. There are a lot of terrible things in life. A bad driver’s license photo is not one of them.

Critically Rated at 7/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Renewing Your License at the DMV

I had the day off today. I didn’t do anything fun though. I had to renew my license at the DMV. I made an appointment a few weeks ago, but that didn’t save me much time. I got to the DMV a half hour before my scheduled appointment. I waited in the line for people with appointments for about fifteen minutes just so the DMV guy could give me a number and tell me to wait until they call it. I found a chair and waited for about ten minutes. Then they called my number, I went to a window, and the DMV lady went over my paperwork. Then I had to take a vision test. I have terrible Asian eyesight, so that was pretty nerve-wracking. I did ok with both eyes, but everything went blurry when I had to cover my left eye. I thought I would fail right then and there, but I wasn’t as blind in my other eye. My vision was good enough for me to pass. That’s kind of scary. It makes me wonder how many blind drivers there are on the road. After I eeked out my narrow vision victory they took a copy of my thumbprint. Then I had to pay thirty-three bucks because that’s how much renewing your license costs. Then I had to wait in another line to get my picture taken. That line took the longest. It was only five people deep but it took about thirty-five minutes for me to get to the front. It only took about forty-five seconds for them to take my picture. I don’t know why it took so long. Renewing your license at the DMV sucks. I’m glad I don’t have to worry about it again for another ten years or so.

Critically Rated at 6/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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