Tag Archives: toes

Picking Things Up With Your Toes

Picking things up with your toes is a useful skill. It’s perfect for when you drop a small object while you’re barefoot and you’re too lazy to lean over to pick it up. You’ll be able to recover a dropped fork without crawling under the table. It might not be hygienic, but it gets the job done. You should practice picking things up with your feet. Start with a pen or keys and work your way up to larger objects like cell phones. Once you’re skilled enough, you’ll be able to able to feed grapes to your lover with your hands tied behind your back. The ability to pick things up with your toes is proof that we evolved from monkeys. It’s in our DNA. It’s a skill that we need to bring back.

Critically Rated at 12/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Clipping Your Nails Too Short

You can either bite your nails or clip them to keep them short and maintained. Biting is messy and people judge you if they see you doing it, so it’s better to use nail clippers to trim them. Just be carful you don’t get carried away. Clipping your nails too short can hurt and feel uncomfortable, especially on your toes because you have to wear socks and shoes. It feels like someone is stepping on your toes all day long. And nails take forever to grow, so sometimes it sucks for a while. Clipping nails is like drinking, you have to know your limit or you’ll regret it the next day.

Critically Rated at 7/17

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