Tag Archives: new year

Happy New Year!

It’s 2016 now. 2015 is over and done with. It’s a new year, a fresh start, and you should take advantage of it. Do things you’ve thought about doing. Go places you’ve thought about going. Talk to people you thought about talking to. Eat things you’ve thought about eating. Drink things you’ve thought about drinking. Watch stuff on Netflix that you thought about watching. Trying things you’ve thought about trying (that sounds similar to doing things you’ve thought about doing, but there’s a difference. Just ask Yoda). Shit or get off the pot. We could all get wiped out by an asteroid or you could get hit by a bus at any second, so get rid of any lingering regrets while you have time to do it. Life is precious but not guaranteed. I’m not trying to be a bitter Betty, I’m trying to motivate you à la Shia LaBeouf. I mean it when I say “Happy New Year!”… I want your new year to be happy.

Critically Rated at 16/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

  

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New Year’s Resolution

A New Year’s Resolution is a promise that you make with yourself starting on New Year’s Day. Some people give up smoking or junk food. Some people vow to exercise twice a week. Some people decide to volunteer at a soup kitchen or to help the less fortunate. It really doesn’t matter what your New Year’s Resolution is because you’re never going to follow through on it. A New Year’s Resolution is just a promise to yourself that you haven’t broken yet. You might be good and follow the plan for a week or two, but you’ll slip into your old habits eventually. It’s yet another way to disappoint yourself. I’ve only made one resolution that has stuck and that was the year I decided to stop doing New Year’s Resolutions.

Critically Rated at 8/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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New Year’s Day

Congratulations, you made it to another year. Hopefully you wake up with a headache and a hangover and someone lying next to you. That’s usually a good indication of a great New Year’s Eve. New Year’s Day is like hitting the reset button. A new year is a new start. Most people have a list of New Year’s Resolutions like quitting smoking or saving more money. Most people give up by February, but at least you tried to change. It’s not worth much, but it’s worth something. 2013. It’s officially the future. Can we stop doing Gangnam Style now? Please?

Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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New Year’s Eve

Holy shit, it’s the last night of the year! Time to get drunk and reminisce on 2012. New Year’s Eve is one of the most popular holidays. It’s celebrated around the world, across all religions and ages. Everyone is looking for some place to be at midnight. Little kids and old people celebrate quietly at home, while everybody else is at a party, either on the street, in a club, or at somebody’s house.

New Year’s Eve is all about midnight. The whole day is building up to midnight. There are fireworks and champagne and making out at midnight. Everyone asks where you’re going to be at midnight, and the next day everyone asks where you were at midnight. You’re almost never where you wanted to be at midnight. I’ve spent midnight in cars going to bars, I’ve spent it running down the sidewalk trying to get to a party before the ball dropped, I’ve spent it with random semi-friends in strange cities. The problem with NYE is that it’s too overhyped. You want it to be perfect and it never will be. Hollywood lied to you. You’ll never be happy.

Critically Rated at 12/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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