Tag Archives: dark

Sunglasses at Night

There’s a timeless song by Corey Hart that contains the lyrics “I wear my sunglasses at night, So I can, So I can.” Nobody knows what he’s referring to and nobody wants to. They just want to sing along and also rock some shades. Wearing sunglasses at night makes you feel like a badass because you aren’t supposed to wear them at night. Half of the pictures I took of my group in Alaska were of us wearing our sunglasses at night because it never got dark and you actually needed to wear them. I wear my sunglasses at night because they are practical doesn’t have quite the same ring to it, but it’s still a valid statement in the 907. That’s the area code for Alaska. The whole state has one area code. The biggest state in the United States has only one area code. How quaint.

Critically Rated at 12/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Power Outage

I’m an American of the 21st century and I rely on electricity. Sometimes the power goes out, mostly because of freak accidents involving weather or vehicles hitting utility poles, and occasionally it gets shut off because of neglected electrical bills. It’s always good to be prepared and have a flashlight or candles handy in case of an emergency. A source of light is comforting and it’s also nice to be able to see what you’re doing. Just be careful if you’re taking a piss by candlelight: dripping hot wax on your junk isn’t that fun. It burns and you’ll probably drop the candle in the toilet. When I was a kid, a power outage was a time to gather around the kitchen table playing cards and board games while eating ice cream before it melts. These days everyone gathers around the iPad, hoping it doesn’t run out of battery because then they would actually have to talk to each other. And kids are already too fat today; they don’t need any more ice cream.

Critically Rated at 9/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Light Switch

A light switch is a switch that turns a light on and off. If the light is off and you flick it, the light will turn on. If the light is already on and you flick the switch, then the light will turn off. It’s a pretty straightforward way of controlling the light. Sadly, some people don’t know how a light switch works. They know that if they go into a dark room and can’t see anything they can flick a switch and a light will come on. But they don’t know how to turn off the light when they leave the room. Nobody taught them that a light switch goes both ways (like your mom). I don’t know whether to feel sorry for them or to slap them (like your mom). The general rule states that you turn on the light when you need to see, and you turn it off when you don’t need to see. There are exceptions of course, like leaving a light on to stop burglars or to grow weed. Other than that, you should turn off the light when you leave the room. Unless there are still other people in there.

Critically Rated at 12/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Filed under Random Rants