Tag Archives: barry bonds

Steroids in Sports

As long as there have been games and sports there has been cheating. Cheating and competition go hand in hand. Anyone who has ever played Monopoly wants to be the banker. Why? To steal money when no one is looking and buy yourself choice properties. So when a professional athlete takes steroids to perform better, it’s understandable. They just want to win. And if they want to sacrifice their balls to do so, I think that’s pretty fair.

An athlete getting caught juicing is like seeing a mouse. When you see one, you can be sure that there’s a lot more. Not every player is taking roids. It’s not as rampant as the Bonds-Canseco-McGwire era. But there are still a lot of juicers; they are just smarter about not getting caught. Except Melky Cabrera. But pitchers are using steroids too. It’s still a level playing field.

Sports are entertainment. There’s drama and elation and characters and storylines to follow. You love your team, but if they don’t go to the championship it won’t ruin your life. You know what’s entertaining? 500 foot home runs. Big tackles. The Expendables 2. Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger take steroids and everyone pats them on the back.

My official opinion on steroids is: WHO THE FUCK CARES? People cheat. It sucks. Get over it. Anything is ok as long as you don’t get caught.

Critically Rated at 11/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

Leave a comment

Filed under Entertainment

Celebrities That I’ve Seen Personally

There’s over seven billion people in the world, so there’s a pretty good chance that you will see people everyday. Every once in a while you will see someone you recognize but never met. And you will geek out a little bit because you just saw someone famous. Randomly bumping into a celebrity on the street isn’t that common (unless you live in LA). I find that just as excited to see an A-list celebrity as I am to see a guy who guest starred on Lost. I haven’t seen anyone super famous, like Jack Nicholson or the Pope, but I’ve seen a few people.

Here is a partial list of the celebrities that I have come face to face with, talked to, and/or made physical contact with (handshakes, fist bumps, accidently walking into). There is no particular order to my list, they aren’t sorted by date or by how famous they are.

I lived in LA for nine months. You see celebrities all day long down there. They are like pigeons, you can’t avoid them, they are everywhere. I worked at Chili’s in Westwood, near UCLA. And I would see the most random people like J.D. Walsh (Mackey from Smart Guy, Gordon from Two and a Half Men). One day Holly Madison, Bridget Marquardt, and Kendra Wilkinson from the Girls Next Door came in with seven other Playmates. They were wearing t-shirts and jeans weren’t dressed up, but they were stunning.

Master P, Lil Romeo (he was still Lil Romeo at the time) and their bodyguard came in and got lunch. Kevin Connolly (E from Entourage) came in by himself on a Saturday night. He is a tiny little guy. I also saw Rick Fox from the Lakers, and he is 6’7”. Pretty damn tall.

The first “celebrity” that I remember talking to was Annette from the second season of Bug Juice. Bug Juice was like the Real World for kids and took place at a summer camp. I saw Annette at the Marin County Fair. My friend pointed her out and told me who she was. And I yelled, “Hey, Annette! Are you from Bug Juice?” and she nodded so I’m pretty sure it was her.

I live in San Francisco now. Up here, I’ve bumped into Andris Biedrins from the Warriors and he is 7 feet tall. I really bumped into him: my buddy shoved me into him rather than simply point him out to me. I met Randy Johnson on my birthday in 2009 and he gave a birthday fist bump. I also met Barry Bonds back in the day and got his autograph of piece of graphing paper because that was the only thing I had available. Pablo Sandoval has come into the restaurant that I work at now a few times, sometimes with a random hot chick, sometimes by himself.

Recently I got to serve Aldon Smith, one of the best defensive rookies in the NFL last year. Other professional athletes I’ve seen: Andre Agasi when he was at the top of his game. I played one season of Little League, and one of the players I competed against is Bud Norris of the Houston Astros. I also saw pitcher Kevin Correia (currently pitching for the Pirates, but I saw him when he was pitching for the Giants).

I’ve met a few musicians like James Hetfield from Metallica and Tom Johnston of the Doobie Brothers. I am the one who told Tom Johnston’s son what Doobie meant. That’s pretty awesome.

A bunch of my friends have seen Dave Chappelle walking around SF streets. I’m not that lucky, but I did see Jim Breuer and his family. That’s not nearly as cool, but that’s half the cast of Half Baked right there.

The biggest celebrity that I’ve met is Warwick Davis. I know I said that Kevin Connolly was tiny, but Warwick Davis is actually a little person. I actually went up and introduced myself as a big fan and shook his hand. Yes, I told a little person actor that I was a big fan… not the smoothest thing that I’ve done. Warwick Davis is in some of the biggest movies of all time. He was the main Ewok (Wicket) in Return of the Jedi. He was motherfucking Willow in Willow. He was Professor Flitwick (and sometimes Griphook) in the Harry Potter movies. He was the Leprechaun in the Leprechaun movies. He is a pretty well established actor and it was awesome meeting him. Fucking Star Wars and Harry Potter… Yeah, I geeked out a little bit.

Celebrities are just people that are on TV and in the movies. And that makes them better than you. It’s just a fact of life, don’t take it personally. That’s why you freak out a little and change your Facebook status and text your friends.

Critically Rated at 13/17

Leave a comment

Filed under Entertainment

LeBron James

Love him or hate him, LeBron James is good for basketball. You need a guy that stands out, that elevates the game to another level. LeBron James is the best player in the NBA right now. He’s a one-man show, but he’s also a great passer, he’s a willing team player. He’s not the best ever, but you could argue that he is, and that’s the sign of a great player. He came up in the spotlight. He was hailed as the next Michael Jordan. Despite all the attention and focus on him, he still emerged as a force to be reckoned with. He could have been and should have been a bust with all the pressure he was under. But now he has his ring. People will bash him for leaving his original team and chasing one. But that is what you need to do to become a legend. Charles Barkley never got a ring, and he will never be considered as one of the best for that simple reason.

LeBron James reminds me a lot of Barry Bonds. A lot of people loved him. It seemed even more people hated him. They would boo him, they would jeer him, they would taunt and heckle him. But when he stepped up to the plate everyone would shut the hell up and watch. Because they knew that they were about to witness the best in the game demonstrate why he is the best in the game. Barry never got his ring though. LeBron did.

Props to LeBron. Props to the NBA. A win for the best is a win for everyone.

Critically Rated at 11/17

Leave a comment

Filed under People I Feel Sorry For