Monthly Archives: October 2014

October 3, 2014 · 10:19 pm

Spare Tire

A spare tire is an extra tire that you keep in your trunk in case your vehicle gets a flat tire. Sometimes it’s a full-sized tire and sometimes it’s a smaller tire designed for temporary use until you get a new one. I remember the first time I changed a spare tire. I was in a mall parking lot searching for my friend’s car when we noticed a couple of pretty blondes with a flat. We walked over to help (and make small talk). I raised the car on the jack, and my friend and I took turns removing the lug nuts. We put on the new tire, tightened it up, and double-checked each nut to make sure it wouldn’t fall off. They had the smaller spare tire, the kind that’s only good for about fifty miles so we told them to go slow, be careful, and go to a mechanic as soon as possible. I mentioned to my friend later on that it was the first time I ever changed a tire and that I was glad he was there to guide me through it. He said he thought I was showing him how to do it and that he never changed a tire before either. They got home ok. I think. Fingers crossed. I’ve changed a few tires since then and everybody’s survived so I have a pretty good track record no matter what.

Critically Rated at 11/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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October 3, 2014 · 10:17 pm

Orange Tic Tacs

I had the munchies and went to the store and came back with some beer, soda, chips, and a container of two hundred Orange Tic Tacs. That’s a lot of Tic Tac. I enjoy all the flavors of Tic Tac, but I’m a big fan of Orange. I’m not sure how much it freshens your breath, but it tastes good and it’s the most chewable of all the Tic Tac flavors. It’s not really chewy, it’s crunchy and it crumbles. The unique texture and delicious flavor combination is enough to keep me from sharing. I know that I have two hundred orange Tic Tacs, but if I give you one I would only have a hundred and ninety-nine. You’re like me in high school: you’re not getting any.

Critically Rated at 13/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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October 2, 2014 · 12:09 pm

The Best That Never Was (documentary)

Marcus Dupree had it all in the early ‘80s. He was one of the best young football players in the country with the skills and flair needed to become a superstar. The Best That Never Was tells the true story of how he could have been a household name until he squandered it away. Director Jonathan Hock’s ESPN 30 for 30 documentary explores Dupree’s incredible football career through a mixture of interviews and film footage. You see how he grew up and developed a talent for football, how he harnessed that power and became a high school phenom, how the colleges came calling, how the cockroaches came out and exploited him, and how injuries and immaturity caused his career to tailspin until he ended up as forty-six year-old truck driver watching highlight reels of his glory days with a tear in his eye.

It’s a cautionary tale about the dangers of professional sports and how the lure of fame and money can destroy talent. It’s riveting. Dupree ultimately finds some redemption, but he knows that he made a lot of mistakes in his life. He has a lot of regrets, understandably so. There are a lot of good entries in the 30 for 30 series and this is one of the better ones. I highly recommend it. Watch it below if you have a couple of hours to kill.

Critically Rated at 15/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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October 2, 2014 · 11:23 am

Guinness

Guinness is an Irish Dry Stout from Ireland. It’s one of the most popular beers in the world, and I don’t know why. It’s extremely overrated and not that enjoyable. It’s rich and creamy with hints of caramel, coffee, and roasted barley. It looks dark and tastes heavy, but it’s deceiving because it’s only 4.2% alcohol. That’s less booze than Budweiser. It’s more filling than Budweiser so you can’t drink more of them to make up for the lack of booze. Guinness drinkers take Guinness way too seriously. They will only drink it on draft, and only if it’s poured correctly. Yes, there’s a specific way to pour Guinness. I won’t go into details because I don’t care about pouring a shitty beer a specific way. Look up instructional videos on YouTube if you really care that much. The best thing about Guinness is the brand recognition. Guinness is a beer that even non-beer drinkers know, mostly because of the Guinness Book of World Records. The Guinness Book of World Records lists a bunch of random records like the fastest bird, highest-selling musical artists, heaviest human being, etc. it sounds educational, but it was created to settle bar bets. Now we use iPhones and Google to win arguments. Guinness is a decent beer, but it doesn’t deserve the acclamations it gets. It’s a boring beer.
Critically Rated at 10/17
Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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