Tag Archives: text messages

Backward Emoticons

Emoticons are those little smiley face things that you use in text messages and on the Internet. They as common as expressions like LOL and JK and they often appear in conjunction with each other: “Hey babe, I need to take a shower. Want to join me? 🙂 LOL”. The traditional way to do an emoticon is to do the eyes first, then the nose, then the mouth. If you do it right, it will get autocorrected into a cartoon smiley. But there are a lot of rebels/idiots who make backward emoticons. It will look like (-: or (: and that’s the wrong way to do it. It looks like a frowny face at first glance. It looks weird because most people do it the right way. And it also doesn’t autocorrect, which is a big sign that you’re doing it wrong. And you look like an idiot if you can’t make a smiley face the right way. Just do what normal people do and avoid using backward emoticons. Eyes to the left, mouth to the right… left to right, it’s just like reading or writing. What a novel concept.

Critically Rated at 4/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Filed under Random Rants

Edward Snowden

Edward Snowden is the guy who found out that the National Security Agency has been illegally spying on you. Yes, you. You should be outraged. He found out that the NSA was conducting mass surveillance on US citizens by monitoring and storing communications data. They were also spying on millions of Chinese citizens, turning it into an international affair. He decided to do the right thing and share that information with the public. Then the government labeled him a traitor. And he’s been on the run ever since. So to recap: he found out that the NSA was illegally spying on millions of citizens by reading and collecting your emails and text messages, he told the public, and now he’s a fucking criminal. The guy is a hero, he should be celebrated. Instead he’s a fugitive and has to seek asylum in a foreign country. The government is probably monitoring me now because I wrote about Edward Snowden. And now they are probably watching you because you read this article about him. 2013 looks an awful lot like 1984.

Critically Rated at 15/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Filed under People I Feel Sorry For