Tag Archives: stupid

Broken Escalator

I was going into the subway the other day when I saw a woman approaching the escalator. It wasn’t moving. She saw that it wasn’t working and  then she went out of her way to take the stairs instead. I couldn’t help but laugh at her. She recognized that the escalator was broken but opted to take the stairs, completely unaware that broken escalators are stairs. I don’t get it. Broken escalators look exactly like stairs. Yet I could see her entire thought process unfold in front of me: Damn, the escalator is out of commission. Better take the stairs! That’s the only way out of this mess. I know that I’m an asshole because it doesn’t matter what she’s accomplished in her life, she will always be a failure to me. 

Critically Rated at 4/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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Filed under People I Feel Sorry For, Random Rants

Hoping No One Saw You Slip

You walk all the time, you’re pretty good at it. Sometime you’re walking from one spot to another, just like you’ve done a thousand times before, when suddenly you slip. You regain your balance before you fall on your ass, and you glance around hoping no one saw you slip. But someone always does, usually somebody who already thinks you’re stupid. They’ll say something witty like, “Don’t worry, nobody saw that.” And you’ll pretend to laugh, but you’re dying inside.

Critically Rated at 9/17

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Filed under Random Rants