Tag Archives: singing

June 16, 2013 · 8:06 am

Singing the Wrong Part

You’re driving down the street and your favorite song comes on. You crank up the volume and start singing along and bobbing your head to the beat. You’re anticipating your favorite part coming up, and as it comes you belt it out with conviction and gusto. And then you realize that you’re singing the wrong part and it’s pretty obvious to anyone listening to you. And you feel like a fool. Maybe you don’t know the song as well as you thought. Singing the wrong part isn’t a big deal, but it’s the universe’s way of telling you to shut the fuck up and keep quiet. You shouldn’t sing the song if you don’t know the song. And your voice sucks too, so there’s another reason to be quiet.

Critically Rated at 8/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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April 13, 2013 · 10:38 am

Karaoke

Karaoke is an ancient Japanese word that means amateur singing fueled by alcohol. It’s a great way to embarrass yourself or delude yourself into thinking you’re a rock star. You go into a karaoke bar, you choose a random song, the DJ calls your name, the music starts, the lyrics show up on a TV screen, and you stumble your way through it. People either cheer you or jeer you. You should be too fucked up to know either way. You have to choose a song that you know all the words to and something that’s fun to sing… that’s why you hear so many songs by Journey and Queen. It’s not karaoke until someone belts out Don’t Stop Believin’ or Bohemian Rhapsody. Some people take karaoke way too seriously. Those people are losers. Karaoke is supposed to be fun and freeing, like singing in the shower (only fully clothed and less damp). You haven’t truly lived until you’ve sung a song in front of a group of strangers. Get on it.

Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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June 18, 2012 · 11:29 am

Thinking You Are Home Alone When You Aren’t

If you live with other people, you are generally aware if you are home alone or not. When other people are there, you act normally. When you think you are home alone you are more likely to use the bathroom with the door open, or sing a Katy Perry song with passionate off-key wails, or have a full on conversation out loud with yourself. And then you see your roommate staring at you with disbelief. The only thing you can do is play it off like you knew he was there the whole time and keep on singing.

Critically Rated at 7/17

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