We went to the movies the other night and we got there kind of late. There were no open seats except for in the front row. We briefly debated returning our tickets and getting our money back, but then we decided to suck it up and sit in the front. Sitting in the front row makes you feel like you’re a little kid staring at the TV from a foot away. The screen is so big and wide that you physically have to move your head around in order to follow the action. You get a crick in your neck from constantly tilting your head back and you leave the theater all sore, like you were working out instead of sitting on your ass in the dark for two hours. Sitting in the front row is your punishment for smoking in the parking lot beforehand. Bring an edible next time.
Critically Rated at 5/17
Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young