Tag Archives: allergic

Gluten-Free

I’ve been serving tables for about nine years now and I’ve noticed the increasing trend in people pretending to be gluten-free. That’s fucking bullshit. Jimmy Kimmel did a survey and he discovered that most people who claim to be gluten-free don’t even know what gluten is. It’s just hip to be gluten-free I guess. A few years ago everyone was doing the Atkins Diet because carbs were bad. Now anything associated with wheat is evil. I know approximately two people that are genuinely allergic to wheat. They’ve adapted to a world of Wheat Thins and Wonder Bread. They know what products contain wheat. They know what they can eat and what they can’t eat. All the people jumping aboard the Gluten-Free Bandwagon have no clue what they can eat or can’t eat. They only want to impress people by having picky eating habits. They just end up making servers go out of their way to accommodate them. You say you’re gluten-free? I’m going to slip you a crouton and see if you’re telling the truth. You should have an EpiPen if you’re really allergic.

Critically Rated at 2/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

Gluten free signal

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Pretending You’re Allergic to Something You Just Don’t Like

Pretending you’re allergic to something you just don’t like is quickly becoming the new trend in eating out and it needs to stop. I know that some people have real allergies. Some people can’t even look at a peanut without going into cardiac arrest. Those people have the right to be picky and demand special treatment; it’s totally acceptable if it’s a life or death situation. But some people abuse the system by pretending they have allergies to avoid things that they don’t like. If they don’t like fish, they will claim to have a seafood allergy. If they are dieting and worried about carbohydrates, they will claim to have a gluten allergy. I think they need to lighten up and stop being so damn picky. Pretending you’re allergic to something is a slap in the face to people who have real allergies. And it’s a weird thing to lie about. If you don’t like tomatoes, just say you don’t like tomatoes. You don’t need to pretend like a tomato will kill you. You’re not going to get my sympathy; you’re just going to make me want to feed you a tomato.

Critically Rated at 3/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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