Sex is a beautiful thing, a natural part of life. Listening to people having sex is a part of life too, albeit a shitty part of life. You hear groans and grunts, moans and creaking, skin slapping, and heavy panting, and you hope that you don’t sound like that but you know that you do. The worst thing about listening to people having sex is that you’re not getting any. You try your best to ignore it but it’s a futile exercise. You’re going to hear it and it’s going to be slightly awkward when you see them the next day. But we all went to college, and I’m sure we’ve all fooled around when there were other people in the room. It’s kind of funny that we don’t appreciate listening to people having sex but we have no problem with other people hearing us having sex. You want people to know that you’re having sex. One of the perks of getting laid is getting other people jealous that you’re getting laid.
Critically Rated at 9/17
Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young