Early Birthday Wishes

Facebook has a feature that informs you of birthdays. It’s a pretty useful tool. It helps it seem like you remembered/cared about the day someone was born. But sometimes people don’t know how time zones work and someone will post a happy birthday message a day early. It’s a nice gesture, but then you’ll suddenly be bombarded by dozens of other early birthday messages because everyone else saw that you had a birthday message and they don’t want to be the asshole that forgot your birthday. Pretty soon your birthday becomes a trending topic a day early and there’s nobody left to wish you a happy birthday on your actual birthday. At least that’s what you’ll tell yourself as you eat cake in bed crying.

Critically Rated at 10/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young


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