Talking Into a Fan

There’s something about talking into a fan that reverts everybody into being a five-year-old again. It’s fun. It distorts your voice and makes you sound like Darth Vader. Well, a low-rent Darth Vader, but Darth Vader nonetheless. The most important thing to remember about talking into a fan is to keep your distance. Nothing takes the joy out of fan talking faster than getting your tongue stuck in the blades. You’ll end up with a bloody tongue and a broken fan. And no Darth Vader impression is worth that much hassle. Also try not to spit when you’re talking into a fan, it’s like spitting in the wind and you’ll regret it instantly (especially if your tongue is bleeding).
Critically Rated at 12/17
Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young


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