Kajacks

I live in San Francisco and rely on public transportation to get around. That means I get to deal with a lot of crazy people. Like batshit insane. The other day a lady got on the train and made her presence known by asking everyone about kajacks. She stood up and said in a high-pitched voice, “Do you know what the kajacks are? I know what a kajack is.” She then proceeded to sing a song about kajacks, first in English and then in French. She sang nonstop for about five minutes and then suddenly stopped and said, “You can have that for free if you want to buy it.” Then she jumped off the train and out of my life. Now I’ll never know what a kajack is or what they do. I’m not sure I want to know. There’s something intriguing about unsolved mysteries. And maybe she wasn’t even crazy. Maybe kajacks do exist and normal people just can’t experience them. Either way I will never forget that crazy bitch and I’ll be quoting her until the day I die. Do you know what the kajacks are? I know what a kajack is…. You can have that for free if you want to buy it. It’s almost like poetry. Just because she’s crazy doesn’t mean she’s not brilliant.

Critically Rated at 14/17

Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young

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