Belly buttons are freaky reminders that you once lived in your mom’s vagina. There two main classifications of belly buttons. You have your standard “innie” and you have your creepy “outtie.” You want to be an innie because nobody likes outties. Adolph Hitler was an outtie. Mother Theresa was an innie. Walt Disney didn’t even have a belly button.
It feels weird to poke your belly button with your finger. Try it. Just don’t let anyone see you fondling your belly button because they will judge you.
Pierced belly buttons are sexy. On girls. Dudes should generally avoid getting a naval piercing.
Critically Rated at 12/17
Written, Rated, and Reviewed by Brendan H. Young
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